voices in my head...

Off to a super slow start this morning.  I was up late lingering by an evening fire that Hubs made for me.  Even though I was sleepy, I found myself deeply engaged in the hat I was making and the calmness of the evening.  I slept soundly until the sun was creeping over the horizon this morning.  

I felt so accomplished climbing into bed last night.  So many projects were completed or nearly completed.  I finished a hat that had been a stumbling block for me. For no other reason that it had a lot of parts and I was feeling overwhelmed by the assembly process. Ironically, once I decided to finish it, I was completely done in about 30 minutes.  

I've been having a lot of those moments lately.  Internal thoughts, perceptions, etc have led me to be frozen.  Unable or maybe unwilling to move forward.  Those inside voices have been playing hell with my motivation.  Yet, as soon as I decide that I am no longer listening or acknowledging those voices, I am able to zip right through whatever had seemed insurmountable before. Like everything suddenly clicks into place. 

I feel a lot of it ties into the negativity we sometimes tell ourselves.  I don't even know that I am consciously doing it.  I am simply running on an almost auto-pilot of programmed negative thoughts in my head.  Haven't any of you used words like "I'll try", "maybe I can do that", or "I'll give it my best shot"?  I am super guilty of doing that.  I know it.  I'm working super hard at switching off that kind of thought process and simply thinking like I have already accomplished what I am working on. 

My daughter calls it manifesting. She might be right.  As my leg has been healing, I have focused on thinking of it as strong and healed.  Yesterday, I hopped on my elliptical, I was in a positive and uplifted mood.  I didn't for a moment expect it to be difficult or hard, I just expected to do my five minutes (as that is where I am at right now) and be strong. There was a song playing that I liked and I was in a great mental spot, I was four minutes in before I realized that I had been able to bend my knee without much resistance. I have one that is a combination elliptical/bike, I only sat for about thirty seconds.  It just didn't seem like something I needed to do.  

As I am learning to change my internal conversations I am also learning the power of those conversations.  Normally, I would have been anticipating a struggle and pain on the elliptical.  Normally, that is what I get.  So many things lately are helping me to think outside of my previous limiting thoughts.  

I now find myself having different conversations inside my head.  Ones that are more like "I am doing", "I can easily accomplish this" or "I am skilled at this, it wasn't difficult at all".  I've noticed that I can and do accomplish things that seemed daunting not too long ago, just by changing my approach to them. 

Today, I will accomplish many things that fill me with joy and pride.  I will finish up a few projects and start a few more.  I will enjoy my life and focus on living my very best life.  Learning to rephrase the internal conversations is huge for me.  Learning to stop the negative Nelly living in my thoughts pushing fear and uncertainty is completely changing my perspective on life. 

It's really our choice you know.  Live in fear or live in faith...

love and peace...