a new day...

The sunshine rising behind me this morning is a complete lie.  It leads one to believe it is warm and welcoming outside, 16° is hardly warm or welcoming.  I guess we got spoiled by the high sixties that we've been enjoying.  I know I did.  

I developed the habit of taking the pups for a long stroll in the parks, it was inviting.  Now they've developed the habit of taking long strolls and their fur coats keep them nice and comfy, so mom is definitely going to be bundling up.  Especially as the later half of this week promises either rain, snow or ice.  I definitely love walking in the snow, but the other two... well not a fan favorite. 

I can hardly believe how productive the past week has been.  I'm sure some of it was the mental lifting I experienced.  Some was losing the splint on my poor thumb - incredible how freeing that little event was.  And the rest was just a strong desire to become involved in my day to day life again. Waiting for that healing was exhausting and the extra steps to work around it was even worse.  

Today, is going to be another day to catch up on all of the things that have been lingering. Waiting patiently for my attention.  

My broken thumb meant I wasn't able to do the Bonnie Hunter mystery quilt in real time.  That doesn't mean I am not going to do it, just that it isn't going to be "live".  I also signed up for two other mystery quilts.  Thankfully they started this month, so I can get my fabrics picked and my first month of sewing completed before next months clue.  They are both monthly, not weekly.   Sweet Hubs bought me a gift card to my favorite local quilt shop for Christmas, so after I pick from my fabric stash, I can round out the fabrics both quilts at Your Quilt Shop .  I mean a girl needs some kind of reason to go buy fabric that she probably doesn't really need, right??

my original fabric choices for BH

I am also planning to complete all my semi-finished quilts (there are far more than I want to admit) this year.  Done is so much better than perfect and there are some that have been languishing for decades.  I mean my girl is 40, I started one when she was a baby.  Several others were started even further back by my great grandmother.  I definitely do not want to be the third generation that failed to finish them. 

I have 6 batches of soap curing, the cold is keeping them from being ready to unmold just yet.  All together over 3 days, there were a total of 11 body soaps and 1 batch of dish soap made, I felt so productive getting them finished. I put if off for almost a year.  Yet as I was swirling oils and lye, matching mica's and essential oils I felt like a crazy mad scientist - I was in heaven.  Funny how things work out. 

moisturizing avacado bars

calendula cleansing bars

raw shea butter

Lavender and Charcoal

Kokum butter

I'm also going to try my hand at making some lip balms this week. They've been on my list forever, but as usual something else captures my attention and I end up never getting it done.  Ironically, they don't take very long at all to make - same as soap.  I am tired of all the chemicals in my life, and one of my missions this year is to eliminate as many as possible.  Besides, it's simply another skill to add to my life's tool box.  

It definitely feels incredible to feel like me again. I was getting a bit fussy.  Again, some was the stupid thumb issue, but some was finding myself in a bubble of discontent that I hadn't acknowledged.  Sipping my coffee, sitting in the sunshine (false warmth that it is) and just doing life on my terms I can feel my energy and desire to do and be returning.  

play time

I'm still in awe at the effect a small amount of negativity sprinkled on the day can affect everything. It starts to build into an ominous cloud that seems intent on overshadowing everything.  You know it's coming, you start to brace yourself, you start to plan how you will combat it. 

unexpected on Saturday...

Guard yourselves.  Evaluate the energy in your bubble.  Protect your blessings and joy.  

much love, 

b

is the sky falling...

As the "official" new year begins, it feels ominously quiet outside.  A deep darkness that doesn't seem to want to fade into sunlight.  After almost three weeks off, Hubs has headed back to work, the kids returned home, and life is returning to a normal rhythm.  But back to the darkness for a moment, it's after 7am and it is still a cloaking darkness, there is a slight lightening on the horizon, but it's still.  

I guess it feels a bit more creepy due to the fact that here in the metro east we have had two meteorites seen and felt in as many days. Hubs and I were oblivious, but when you live in a world with two big, playful pups and an equally playful Hubs... well, strange noises aren't often noticed.  They are usually drowned out by the chaos of play. 

Just knowing and then being in the heavy darkness as I hauled out the trash can this morning was a bit unsettling. After a week of above average temps, I mean seriously the highest in recorded history - what gives?  We immediately plunged back into our normal biting cold.  Gotta love the mid-west.  

I'm not much of a New Years' kind of gal.  It feels awkward and manufactured to me.  I tend to lean towards a celebratory mood as we edge into springtime.  It feels natural, the world is waking up, there is a newness all around and life feels ready to restart. So needless to say, yesterday was a nothing kind of day for us.  More of an administrative thing.  We ran a few errands, did a few chores and basically caught up on life.  How about you? 

Today, will truly be a bit more of the same.  Hubs being back at work, means the normal flow of days is returning. I have quite a few projects that I intend to tackle this month, with or without a working thumb. I have things that I have decided are deeply important to me to focus on this year, and I intend to do it. 

For years many things have lingered.  No plans to make them reality, just assuming they would come to life on their own.  Strangely (yes I am being factitious) they have not.  Therefore, I have decided to tackle them in the same manner that I would have tackled tasks needing done back when I "worked" in the outside world.  I need to plan. I've spent the past few weeks doing just that.  

Now comes the implementation part of these plans.  Beau will have meds soon and I will swing into my routine.  It feels weird after almost a month.  But also a bit stabilizing.  I am not a sit around kind of person, I thrive with things of value to do.  I know that I get fussy when paused, and this darn thumb has definitely paused me.  Although, I have to own it, I mean, I did cause the damage in a fit of temper.  There are times I absolutely amaze myself. How many people can claim to have broken a thumb making Christmas cookies?  Because this girl 100% can!  Typing is a challenge as it took me several seconds and errors to realize I couldn't use my splint to press the key I wanted... geez... only a few more weeks of this insanity.  I keep telling myself that we can all survive anything for six weeks, as I get fussier and fussier. 

The sky is now a heavy gray, no signs of blue, no definition to the clouds.  Looks like it is simply going to be a dreary, cold day.  To a degree it still looks like something I would've envisioned out of the Stephen King novels I read in my youth, soulless and still.  YUCK! Guess I'll be keeping the curtains drawn as I sew and do projects today.  Who needs that kind of gloominess surrounding them?

I've no idea if I will manage to write consistently in 2026.  Honestly, it depends on my spirit and desire.  I won't ever force myself.  And I think I need a new bingo card for 2026, because it seems to be coming in hot and busy... I guess we'll see.  What about you? 

Much love, 

b

how have you been?

This morning as I was doing my chores, I felt a strong urge to write.  Goodness, it's been a long while. Almost 4 years ago my life took a dramatic turn, a shift. Unplanned, unexpected and suddenly.  One of the greatest gifts I have been given in life.  I find those that fall in that category are usually the best.  A sudden ending, when you aren't brave enough to admit something is not serving you or your life.  When you can add up all the things it's cost you, but you don't have the courage to walk in another direction.  When God steps in and gives you the push you desperately needed, but didn't realize it. 

Endings are nothing more than a chance at a better beginning.  We just often find ourselves blinded in the moment.  Not realizing that the door that slammed shut was because it wasn't serving you. It might even have been causing you harm that you couldn't see in the moment. 

My days have fallen into a beautiful routine.  I'm no longer trying to be a wife, mother, grand mother and homemaker while still being stretched to my absolute limits in a thankless world. It's an incredible feeling to walk in the path you are meant to walk. 

I don't write much anymore.  Not because I don't want to, but because the world has become increasingly more unstable and angry.  Something I really no longer have the need or desire to participate in.  If I do write it is strictly for me, and that alone is very rare.  Although I do miss it.

Today the urge was too great, with a cup of hot coffee, I felt ready to write.  After all the kitchen is cleaned, laundry folded and ready to go upstairs, everyone fed a nutritious breakfast and the doors are open to allow this beautiful day to flow in.  I'm ready.

I've already put the first bit of grass seed down and covered it, so much as been altered in the past year that it is going to be a long season of rebuilding, I'm excited for it. I figured as long as I was playing in the mud, I'd better take advantage of the warmth this week to get my poppy seeds planted.  There is more cold weather rolling in next week and they will need it if they are going to sprout and fill the spaces left barren. In a few more weeks I will plant the cosmos, marigold, and zinnias.  A short time later will find lots of sunflowers planted where they would have never grown a few months ago. And the lilac will finally be planted in the ground.

this guy was amazing - and terrifying

Hubs and I are busy plotting and planning.  How much grass?  Should we add more raised beds?  What do we think is going to happen in this mixed up crazy time that we are moving through? The removal of that massive old bradford pear tree has left us with lots of new options.  Not to mention an enormous pile of wood to cut up for future winter fires. 

half-way there

that ground hadn't seen that much sun
in 30 years

Oddly, I have no anxiety, no stress or fears.  It feels like forever since that has been the way of life. There is a rhythm now, like a slow drumbeat.  That isn't to say I am not paying attention to things.  Or that I haven't noticed the way grocers keep raising prices.  The businesses that have struggled for so long that are finally closing their doors.  I've noticed.  

relaxing with Dad on a cold winter day

Somewhere along the way of the past 4 years a calmness has finally settled.  Our little suburban homestead becomes more solid all the time.  It's almost time to plant the gardens, last fall we planted our first elderberry bushes, we followed the directions to a "t" so with any luck we won't have to travel to pick elderberry in the future.  Hopefully this year will also find us able to plant our own mullein.  We'll see.  If not, there is always a plan "b".  As our yard is more open to sunshine now, we may plant a wider variety of veggies, then again maybe I will plant a beautiful herb garden.  I am overcome with the possibilities.

Soon I will be able to go buy my goats milk again, I can hardly wait.  I also have a local bee keeper I support and it's almost time for the farmers markets to open again.  I'm tired of the world we were living in, we don't play in that world too much anymore.  We are finding our tribe, like minded people, we are learning to support and lift up one another.  To stop relying so hard to sustain something that felt false and unsustainable.

It feels like we've been in a ship on rocky seas for a really, really long time.  And the storm is raging still, it's not over, things need to right themselves.  I think all of us have a different way of dealing with it all.  We all have different ideas of what that righting is and will be.  For us, there is a sense of peace, we aren't playing in those waves as much.  We are choosing a calmer path. 

Washing dishes, cooking meals from the best and cleanest ingredients I can find, cleaning my house, working in my yard, taking care of my Hubs and pups, being there to support my kids and grands when they need it.  And having time to create.  All of these things are stabilizing.  Soon I will head upstairs, to iron and put away laundry.  

My version of Old Town

After the chores are done, I will head to my sewing studio, I decided that I was going to make another version of the Old Town quilt that I made myself.  This one is for my Hubs.  I might be crazy, at over 3100 tiny pieces, it's more intense than a jigsaw puzzle at times.  Yet, getting lost in putting those tiny bits together eliminates room for the chaos of the world to crowd my thoughts. 

the colors for Hub's Old Town

I have some strong ideas about what I am watching unfold.  Very strong, but I'm opting to sit on the sidelines and watch from afar.  I'm intrigued, I'm aware, I'm observing.  But from a distance.  I am focusing on the world right in front of me, I'm focusing on what I can immediately impact.  I'm tried of raging and worrying through things that I have zero control over. 

Over the past few years, I have come to realize the smaller the bubble the happier you become.  I have time to laugh, to worry over my ability to recreate my Hubs favorite meals but in our own kitchen instead of somewhere we don't know what was used.  I have time to stop and observe.  Things have fluttered through the past few years, time has really stopped being relevant or even observable.  I forget things, I laugh, I move on.  So many that I speak to are experiencing the same thing. 

Birthdays, holidays and so much more sneak up and take me by surprise.  Evenings are spent enjoying old shows with Hubs, working on some little thing and chatting during the never ending pharmaceutical commercials. Seriously, whatever happened to Mr. Whipple and his Charmin, or even Clara yelling "where's the beef". Now we mute it because the endless lists of side effects from drugs they are hawking is enough to terrify the staunchest horror movie fan.  Geez, why?  Just why?

I'm toying with a few future ideas, one of which is starting another blog, focusing on living a different kind of life.  Another thing I am exploring is how to help others learn skills that are rapidly fading away, a self-sufficiency that is fading away.  I have a million other thoughts that glide through my mind while I stitch away on one of my vintage Singer sewing machines.  There is something about the sound that welcomes you to slow and daydream. 

My day dreaming often beacons me back here.  I have so many thoughts and memories recorded in these posts.  Time gone by.  I would love to save it, I often wonder if this platform will ever disappear and with it my thoughts and memories.  I am not technically skilled to save them to something else.  It's one of the thoughts that stops me from starting something else.  The technical world is not really for me.  I thrive in a simpler, more hands on world. 

I definitely don't recall planting a Pup

Who knows... the future is just that, the future. For now, the birds are calling, the pups are napping and it's time to go upstairs.  Maybe the blue jay will come back and sit on the branches and watch me sewing.

peace and love on your own journeys...

time in the garden...

I guess I could complain like everyone seems to be doing about the heat.  I am definitely not a fan of hot weather. Instead I am choosing to be grateful.  I am thankful for the air conditioning and the fans that keep our house nice and cool.  I am sure that it definitely does help my gratefulness.  If I were hot non-stop, I think I might struggle with gratitude.  

Instead, I can wander out into my treetop garden and celebrate the fact that the heat is creating the need to harvest several times a day. I am able to keep my dehydrator filled and running almost non-stop right now.  The cayenne peppers are bountiful this year and each time I walk outside it seems like more of them are vibrant red.  This is the first year that I have had more than five or six to last throughout the year.

I'm trying out something new with the abundance of cherry tomatoes.  I've sliced them at a quarter inch and sprinkled them with the garlic salt, made from the scapes. They are in the dehydrator now, if all goes well, they will dry and become a slightly chewy chip. Fingers crossed. And if they aren't something we like as a snack, they are definitely something I can toss into various recipes, just like the powder I made from the dehydrated tomato skins. 

I'm did most of my Monday chores yesterday, I have a lot going on this week.  I was given a couple of bags cucumbers and decided to make cinnamon pickles.  Sometimes known as Christmas pickles. I've never tried them, but when you have an entire sink full of slightly larger cucumbers you need to come up with some use for them. 

I didn't realize they took 5 days before coming to an actual canning stage.  Day two was the most labor intensive if you don't count peeling a sink full of cucumbers.  We won't be able to taste them until day 4 at the soonest.  Hopefully, I am not wasting an incredible amount of time and they are as delicious as everyone says they are.  After all, we were pretty darn happy with the pickled brussel sprouts, and they sure didn't sound all that good. 

Waste not, want not.  

when a squirrel does the planting 
they know nothing about spacing...

All of these blistery hot days are definitely paying off.  It looks like one of the squirrels decided to plant a few tomato plants for me.  I'm debating on what I am going to do with the little volunteer plants that have popped up. I definitely don't have enough bed space to let them all grow, although I absolutely despise pulling them and letting them die. I have no idea which ones are growing, although I am pretty sure that we have enough warm weather ahead for at least another harvest before this season ends. Based on where they are located I am guessing either a cherry tomato or a chocolate cherry tomato.  Both have produced wonderfully. 

cherry tomatoes

Hungarian sweet peppers

gypsy peppers

mini peppers

jalapenos... soon to be jelly

Hubs and I spent the late afternoon in the garden.  Cleaning it up, weeding, tying up tomatoes (did I mention that the tomatoes are going crazy this year?) pruning here and there all the little things that help it continue to produce so well.  I think I am going to fertilize today and plant a few more cow peas.  That should wrap it up.  

I have two more bags of potatoes to check on, they might even be ready to harvest.  Then it's time to decide what I am planting for fall in those bags.  Part of me wants more potatoes, but then I start to consider some beets.  I'm also getting ready to plant the fall lettuces again.  As the season starts to change there are more shaded areas where they will grow well.  Maybe some onions?  And I am waiting slightly impatiently to plant my garlic for next spring. 

The garden definitely consumed the greater part of yesterday.  It's all good, if it hadn't that would mean it isn't thriving. 

not sure why Belle thinks she's a fern...
or why she is in the planter...

Thankfully the weather has cooled a bit today, so it will not be so miserable when I head out to mow the grass.  After I finish the morning chores I will head up to the sewing room for a bit.  I didn't get much made this weekend and need to refocus myself. We headed to a few antique shops and found a few more feed sacks and vintage embroidery work.  My goal is to have 20 of the beautiful pin cushions made by Wednesday.  Shouldn't be hard.  Then I am going to mix it up a bit, I want to create thread catchers/pin cushions with them.  

I bought a very plain one at a quilt show not long ago and I am in LOVE.  I take it with me everywhere that I will be crafting.  It has completely changed my frustration level when doing hand work. I will make a small assortment of those before moving on to the next project.  I can't believe we are already moving into August. 

Tomorrow is the eldest daughter's birthday.  Mine will follow a few days later and then my beautiful grand daughter is two days later.   She and I will do something together to celebrate this year.  I am so thankful for that.  She growing up so fast that before long my sweet girl will be off living her own life and that day between birthday celebration will become the stuff memories are made of. 

I haven't forgotten about 2 Timothy 4:3-4, I'm simply still processing it.  It ties in so soundly with the message that pastor shared yesterday on John 9.  So many thoughts are swirling in my head and I need time to process, maybe ask a few questions.  I am finding the more I think I understand, the more I need to question, the more connections and truths I am finding.  Talk about sliding down rabbit holes. 

Well the sun is starting to rise, soon it will be time to take care of outside chores, so I'd better get busy and finish the inside one. Time is wasting... And I don't wish to waste the blessings from the father...

love and prayers... b

there's a storm rolling in...

There is a storm blowing in.  Well a real storm. By mid-morning we are expecting super high winds, thunder, lightning and rain, lots of rain. I love it!  All of this beautiful rain is turning my corner of the world vibrant spring colors. Everything is bursting with light and life.  

I am concerned that there is worse storm blowing in that is not filled with those wonderful experiences.  I worry that it isn't so much life giving as it is energetically damaging. One that will cause people harm in many ways, not just physical.  Actually, I feel like maybe we have been in a storm for a long while now, and that it is simply escalating. 

The thing is, I am not sure what the end plan of this storm is.  I have a few ideas, I am not altogether sure for some of us the outcome is going to be what it will be for others.  I am afraid some people will be lost as this continues, they aren't riding the waves, they are being sucked into the under current.  They've either forgotten or never been taught how to avoid an under current and the swirling darkness is grabbing at their legs and pulling them down.  When all they need to do is focus on floating above the danger, don't fight it - you can't beat it that way.  By stretching out and floating they will have the ability to remove themselves from the danger. 

I keep getting alerts telling me what to do to be safe with today's incoming storm. How to seek shelter, where to do and what to do. 

Oddly, I haven't heard any warnings about what to do to withstand the storm that we've been in. I was stunned to hear that we are at 8.5% inflation.  I hated math in school, still not something that I spend my free time playing in, but I can do the math needed to know that 8.5% is a fantasy.  Most everything we purchase, even the taxes that we pay have gone up far more than that. And it might not be terrible if that was the only storm out there.  Unfortunately, that feels like it's just the high winds - at almost a CAT 4 tornado level - I would say CAT 5, but I fear it can still get worse and that is the definitely the plan. 

Throw in the booming thunder of fear that is being drummed up yet again.  The powers that be trying to force people back into their homes and into masks.  If the past two years didn't teach us anything, it should have taught us that the thunder is just loud voices yelling to get their way. 

I am not sure what the lightning is... Maybe it is the mandates, or maybe it is the sheer number of people that have lost their jobs (and no folks are not really hiring), or could it be the "supply chain shortages" that are causing true hardships in some areas?  Could it be the latest call of disease impending that could further damage the food supply?  I don't know, it's so multi-pronged. Or could it be the damage being caused to our youth?  I can't even go there right now. 

I know that I think and feel differently than some of those around me.  I always have. 

I know in a real live storm to secure things that could fly through the air and harm not only myself but others.  I know to seek shelter from twisters.  And not to stand under a tree in a lightning storm.  I've been trained to do that since I was young. 

Yesterday, I took the babies for a walk.  Our beautiful subdivision sits in the middle of some interesting real estate.  I climbed the hill they love to go to the top of to survey their kingdom, because that is how it feels.  As we were standing there looking out on the duplexes that are below us I noticed that almost half of the patios that I could see were covered with container gardens in the making.  In years past there was fancy lawn furniture and outdoor play areas. 

Do you know how to plant a victory garden?  Have you ever done it?  Have you ever worked the land to provide food for your family and loved ones? I know for a fact that most towns and communities that we live in today frown on tearing up your pristine grass and planting a garden.  In some you can be fined and told to remove it.  Are you willing to violate that?  And if you are willing, do you even know how?

I remember being a kid and dad and mom insisting that we got a garden plot whenever we lived somewhere that had them available.  I wish I had one now.  I remember walking through my grandpa's garden with him and helping him harvest the sweetest strawberries that I have ever eaten.  Or learning when the corn was ready to pick.  I remember the huge chest freezer, I was mostly interested in the popsicles stashed in there for treats, but I also remember it was filled with deliciousness that he grew with his own two hands and his labor. 

Do we have basic life skills, because that is what is going to be needed to survive this storm. Do you possess a strong work ethic, the willingness to have dirt under your nails, aching muscle from hard labor, or even the willingness to learn new skills?  To make and create the things that you are used to running up to the store or out to a restaurant to grab? Or have you fallen into a trap not of your own making.  Lured by the ease that life has been?  

Try finding a television show that factually depicts what life was like the last time the government crashed the economy. Yet we are lured into watching hours of television, full of ads for things we want, creating a fantasy life that all of us would love to have. 

We recently had an election, there was a proposition on there in our entire county to add another tax on all internet sales.  This was to add additional taxes by the city to the state tax that you already pay on internet purchases. I was curious as to the over all outcome of that vote and had to do some serious searching to find the answers.  It wasn't like I could simply click a single place for election results, easily and without searching. What I found the most disturbing was the trends. The two middle highest income areas passed it. The lowest, poverty stricken areas passed it.  And all of those in the middle areas said no. 

Here's the thing.  It was being sold as you would get more "free" benefits from your local governments,  they simply needed more money to survive and build a budget (even though my own town had a large surplus the past two years), but mostly, they were going to take it to give every one more free things. 

Folks, nothing is free in this world that we are living in. Stop and think about it.  Today I will do my taxes, I am sure I will write a very large check to Uncle Sam and my state government.  Because they feel they need more and more of my hard earned dollars to exist on.  Then stop and think about the fact that congress just voted to give themselves a 21% cost of living pay raise.  Where is that coming from?  And frankly why do they need it?  True leaders take care of the flock, not enrich themselves off their backs.  

You are free to think and feel the way you want.  As am I.  I'm tired of being a sheep being groomed for slaughter.  I'm tired of all my labor enriching those that have never gotten their fingernails dirty trying to coax some vegetables from the ground to enrich their own families. 

Today's incoming storm is nothing compared to the one that we've been in.  As I began typing this, I truly felt like this storm was recent. As my brain explored my thoughts and feelings in depth while I was typing, I realize that this storm has been here a long time. Longer than most of us will even realize.  Most younger people today have never grown food, can't even sew on a button and frankly (based on how busy restaurants and fast food places still are) have limited ability to cook and prepare their own meals. 

This storm has been here for a very, very long time.  Slowly but surely activities that can benefit growth and knowledge have become "uncool" and are disappearing.  Kids don't want to work in the food industry (they would learn from the labor), I don't know if any schools have 4H clubs or Home economics courses anymore - although even when I was going through school I learned more on how to clean the kitchen than the skills I needed and that was over 40 years ago.  Do schools have wood-working or shop classes anymore?  What about automotive classes?  Is that taught anywhere?  

Or do I truly belong to a very extreme clique of people that simply didn't move on?  That thrive with all of those random and useful skills.  Please don't ask me to play a video game with you, I can't.  Or maybe it is that I won't. I took computer programming courses, I can use most modern technology with skill and ease, the thing is... I don't want to. 

I will still have struggles if some of the things I am used to having at my disposal go away.  But I know that I possess the basic skills to survive, even clumsily. Are you part of my tribe?  Are you crazy busy preparing for this part of the storm that we are now in?  Do you have your storm shelter ready?  Supplies on hand? 

I sat with my awesome girlfriends last night for a couple of hours pinching dandelions to get them ready to make jelly.  One of them had gathered a huge bag of them on her way home from work.  While she was gathering them, I was sitting in my yard gathering more wild violets. We are working on improving our skills and providing for ourselves. We talked about different things that we either feel we need to learn or start doing more of to stop being so reliant on things that might not continue to serve us.

I need to take my babies out for a long walk, they will not want to go out in the incoming storm, and I need to get busy working on getting prepared for the storm.  Working on having back ups and plan b's for the crap life is throwing at us. I hope you are at least paying attention to the incoming storms.  That you know how to lift your legs and float so that you are not sucked down.  I pray that my family, friends and loved ones, heck everyone is ready for whatever life throws at you.  Don't wait for someone to come and save you?  Because the reality is that has never been the plan, need a reminder - look at some of the areas of our world that have been destroyed by natural disasters and man made ones.  Look at the devastation to inner cities and ask yourself why. 

Gotta get busy... love and peace...

these times...

So... it is time for Mother Nature to stop, just stop!  The windchill this morning is -1°, as in negative.  I'm so over the cold.  The trees that are heavy with buds agree with me, so do the flowers that have started pushing through and blooming.  Promising that spring time is right around the corner.  I've never been so thankful that the pups agreed and did all of their business in the yard this morning, deciding it was too cold to walk.  I was ready, but I was not excited to walk in the bitter cold.  Just the few minutes we were out there was enough for my fingers to be semi-frozen.  

Tomorrow is supposed to be a balmy 62°, it's no wonder that so many folks are struggling with colds and viruses. It seems like every other day one of our friends is getting sick.  They go to the docs because after the insanity of the last two years everyone rushes to the doc when they feel poorly, only to discover that they have the common cold or an undiscovered type of virus that simply needs to run it's course.  I do find it odd, that with so many folks feeling poorly that it's been almost a month since I have spoken to anyone diagnosed with C19, I'm thankful that has run it's course and people are allowed to just get a cold. I'm sad that so many are so fearful as a result. I just hope all of them get to feeling up to snuff soon. I mean that nice weather is definitely going to be something to enjoy. 

Folks, please tell me that you have your cupboards and freezers filled.  That you are personally channeling some of your parents/grandparents habits from making it through the depression.  Yesterday I ran to the grocery to pick up a few supplies to make my babies their treats, more than a few times I had some sticker shock.  But worse, I was leaning in to grab a package of frozen liver and this senior couple was standing their sorting through the over full bin of corned beef and they were discussing how very expensive it is.  I wasn't eavesdropping the conversation was quite loud, and heart-wrenching.  They kept wondering if they were in the wrong section, were they only looking at the expensive cuts?  Surely these prices can't be right. Were they even going to be able to afford corned beef?  What could they not get so they could have it.  They were so upset and started muttering that maybe they could have something else for St. Patrick's Day.  Just as I was getting ready to offer to buy it for them, they found a small one towards the bottom that wasn't horrible.  It also wasn't big enough for much.  But they were thrilled to still be able to celebrate as they had their whole lives. 

Sadly, I think this is not only going to continue, but I think it's going to get worse. It's not based on anything but common sense, paying attention and being alert. Having been raised military, having raised my babies military, I am extremely aware of how much things cost and how much they have risen.  I know how to live on a limited income. We are being played emotionally and pushed into a state of extreme control. I've read a quote many times over the years about controlling oil and food you can control nations and people.  It has been attributed to Henry Kissinger. I was a bit young when he was active in our politics, but one cannot help feel that this is exactly what is going on in this day and age. 

Have you bought seeds?  Do you have a plan to plant a few things to supplement your groceries?  Oddly victory gardens are trending on most search engines, popping up in social media ads, and getting those seeds is definitely a must.  I am even dusting off my actual gardening books, I have some knowledge, but definitely not enough. 

I am not being a doomsayer, nor am I trying to stress anyone out.  I'm just saying it might be smart to start having a plan B or C.  We are so accustomed to simply driving to the grocery store to pick up what we want.  Many of us don't even plan leftovers or have a plan to use those leftovers to in our meal planning.

I am struggling with the information coming out of our so called leaders.  I am struggling with all of the excuses.  I am struggling with watching people make harder choices than they have been being conditioned to make.  I am struggling with people in all walks of life having to choose to do without, because they simply do not have the ability to expand their sources of income, for whatever reasons are presented to them. I feel too many narratives are incomplete and missing key elements, when questioned they can't stand up to the questions. 

Too many of us have not been seeing the subtle changes happening all around us.  I believe strongly the TP shortage was simply the trial run. And that we are being conditioned to accepting a different kind of life. 

Maybe I am being overly skeptical.  Maybe my natural questioning and untrusting nature is kicking into overdrive.  I don't know.  But I feel deeply that now is the time to dig out those old, almost forgotten habits that you may have seen your elders do, or that you yourself may have used.  Now is the time to remember to use it up, use it out, make it do or do without.  

Do you know how to can?  Have you ever planted a garden (even a small one)? Baked breads or may treats from scratch.  When my kids were small I always baked cookies or sweet treats for them, as they grew and I became busier I fell into the habit of buying those things. I fell deeper into those destructive habits of relying on sources outside of myself to provide.  Maybe there is a reason that I am a stay at home wife, why I am "retired" from the system.  Maybe it is so that I can provide for my family and maintain our homestead during these times. I don't know.  I just know I have a strong feeling about it.  I feel it's time to dig in and make the difference I want to see. 

I pray that I am completely wrong.  That I am being a worrywart and struggling with false realities.  Yet, as I  was awake for hours in the middle of the night, my heart didn't feel like that was the case. 

Each of us has our own choices to make, our own paths to follow.  I am a bit on the fearful side of what desperate people can and will do. 

I don't know why I felt so strongly about writing this today, but I did.  Maybe an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure?  I don't know... but I care enough to follow the feeling. 

love and peace... 

more snow...

In a few... that is my current feeling today. In a few I will do the things.  For now, I am going to sit here on this cold morning and enjoy my fire with my sweet puppies. Mother nature decided we needed at least one more bitter cold, snowy morning to enjoy a raging fire to warm our toes and tummies (if you are a puppy).  So why waste it?

It's so calming.  I can forget that the world is a crazy place to be right now.  I can enjoy the silence and the peace.  Soon, I will get busy.  I have things to do, I'm just not really ready to do them. 

I did all sorts of adulting yesterday.  I need to submit drawings today, but it is all in production now, all we have to do is wait. That is definitely going to be the long part, I started to say hard, but I believe removing the shrubs is going to be much harder than the wait.  Luckily it will be a bit extended, so that will give me time to slowly remove the shrubs that we have debated on for over 7 years.  I like the idea of them, but they look terrible - unfortunately they were not cared for any better than the ones that used to be out front.  We will finally cut them down.  

I will probably just throw them to the back of our property to mulch back into the earth.  I have a large portion that is heavily wooded and the deer, squirrels and other woodland critters will love them. I am also going to clear out a lot of the ivy's and "weeds" that grow fairly uncontrolled still.  Finally, we will add some sod to improve the grass that hasn't really grown due to the shade and the deer parading all over it non-stop.  I have a lot to accomplish in the next few weeks. Part of me hopes it won't take 10 weeks, the other part is praying for the time.  

After the fence is in, I've decided to go to the backside and plant a bunch of sunflower seeds and wild flowers on the hill.  I've halfheartedly tried a few times in the past, but my damaged knee held me back.  My new knee is so much more stable, that I finally feel okay giving it a try.  I can already picture the fencing line with a field of sunflowers behind it.  Well, at least that is what I see in my mind's eye.  I'm sure it will be a serious battle with the birds and wildlife to bring it to fruition, but a girl can hope!  I might have to hit up a dollar store for a few more packets of seeds.  

Today is for daydreaming, not doing. 

Today is my sweet girls' birthday.  It is also a dear friend's birthday.  Actually, I know many people that share this special day.  I would love to celebrate it with her, but she is going to be adulting herself today.  So we gathered together at one of her favorite places to have a burger and celebrated her last night.  Hubs is a birthday fiend.  It's humorous to me, because I am more of a low key kind of person where they are concerned. I think my girl is a lot more like me in that way.  Family gathered around the dinner table is plenty.  Or doing something special together.  Hubs and I usually spend mine floating down a river. 

I find it is just another day.  I don't always even remember how old I am, it's not something I track.  I was stunned last night when I realized I was only a year older than she is now when I moved here to be be with my sweet Hubs.  Talk about a jolt to the system. 

I'm super proud of the woman that she is.  I love her generous spirit and loving heart.  I hate when people take advantage of those very characteristics, I cherish that she doesn't allow those people to sway her from moving it forward and still being loving and generous. She is special! Her vibrant personality is infectious.  

Well, it looks like our oldest managed to persuade her younger sister to let us celebrate her.  Tomorrow we will all gather for dinner!  I'm so excited.  It's great for my girl to have an older sister, she is far too used to being the oldest and in complete control, a Pieces should never be in complete control FYI. I'm just pointing that out for those in the room that have never had to deal with a Pieces in complete control, everyone else knows exactly what I mean. 

It's still gonna be a lazyish day for me.  I am going to whip up a few more puppy treats, we are experimenting - FYI - they love liver.  The oldest grand daughter is coming over for me to look at a dress and see if I can alter it for her.  We'll see, it's been a long time since I have altered a formal gown. But not feeling like much else will happen, basic household chores and some crafting, but that looks to be just about it. 

I mean what else is there to do on a snowy, cold late winter day?  Throw a log on the fire and relax, right?

love and peace...

homesteading in the burbs?

Took the pups for an early morning walk today.  Such a different morning, but just as beautiful in it's own way.  Hubs and I try to make their walks (and ours) varied and exciting, nothing worse than doing the same thing every single time you leave the house.  

The weather yesterday was beautiful and we managed three very long walks.  When it is 75° in March you take advantage of it.  Today was a cool 44°, very hazy and overcast.  Not cold, just cool. You could feel the moisture in the air as we walked.  I guess it stormed really bad last night, my phone was full of alerts when I woke up today, I missed it.  Heck it's March in the mid-west, this is completely normal and to fully be expected. Each day is a gift, it just depends on how you choose to view it. I spied some of the early blossoming trees getting ready to pop! Talk about a gift!

The custard shop opened yesterday so both babies got a pup cup.  They earned it after the long walk up there, and honestly they enjoyed it completely! I was concerned their little tummies wouldn't do well with it, but no problems.  This is an occasional treat, not daily, the vet said it would not hurt them.  And as much as we walk, my babies are not going to have a weight problem at all, heck they are making sure mom and dad don't have weight problems. We managed over 7 miles of walking yesterday alone.

We did some planning, prepping (I bought everything I could early for his birthday party next month - prices are going up too high to ignore), and just being.  It felt so good to be busy. 

We finally decided on the color I am going to paint the front door.  It's going to be a colonial red, after years of dark blue we are making a dramatic change.  Our house is a lovely blue gray color so it will look stunning.  And between the door, the trim and the house it all blends in perfectly with my very patriotic decorating theme. 

I even got some bulbs planted in the front bed.  When we moved in there were overgrown boxwood's in there.  They were horrible, you couldn't even use the sidewalk as half of it was covered. We tried to trim them back, but they were far to gone for that.  Trimming exposed the bare undersides from years of neglect, so of course the only option was to pull them out. Yikes, what a chore that was, our grandson's gave us a hand, but it still left a great many problems.  Things like poor soil and tons of rocks coupled with an immense amount of shade.  

Those beds have been the bane of my existence. A dear friend gave me some ferns for the one side and they have come back year after year beautifully, spreading to fill the entire space (we will have to see how they do with puppies... oh my) but the other side was simply sad.  Slowly I have been working on it.  It's the home to my hyacinth, there are some hosta's and two other plants that I can't remember the name of, but I liked.  I am filling it with perennials.  Yesterday I added a couple more hostas - big bushy ones at the base of the Japanese maple (which I need to prune by next weekend) and then I discovered some flowering plants - Astilbe, I have never heard of them before, nor have I planted them.  So I decided to go for it.  They are shade loving, but can tolerate a bit of sun, perfect for that spot.  They grow tall and flower.  I put three different kinds and heights into the bed.  We will see... 

The warm weather was definitely motivating me, I wanted so badly to start planting, the next month will be brutal for me.  My mind will turn to planting, my fingers will long to be mucking in the dirt, my brain will be fighting with it all telling me it is far too early to start, to have patience. Ughh... there's that word again. My search for distraction while still moving in a forward direction lead me to purchase some garden towers, two of them.  They will be perfect to plant my Herbs and green leafy vegetables in.  I might also add some borage.  I've never grown it either, but the more I learn, the more interested I am. 

Can't tell I am still bouncing around in my head can you?  Not sure how my sweet Hubs puts up with me, probably why he finds himself watching a ton of movies and television shows - self defense from my slightly non-stop doing. The best part is that he encourages my crazy!

I bought all the ingredients I needed to start making my puppies food yesterday, so that is seriously on the agenda today, around parties and dinners.  I am going to get a good sized batch made up and get is stored in the fridge and freezer.  I am tracking the cost and everything to figure out how to make it the most cost effective and healthy. Today's batch is going to be a combination of chicken, beef, oats, sweet potatoes, carrots, blueberries and coconut oil.  I am not sure I will have time to work on biscuits, but there is always tomorrow for that. 

I am definitely moving back into a semi-homesteading mode.  I feel it. Coming out of winter hibernation into all of this inflation is an uneasy place to be, I don't like it.  I feel like things are out of control and I am working to bring them back into balance.  It feels wobbly. 

Anyone else thinking over their path through these times?  Concerned about the journey? Or do you have confidence in your own abilities to navigate things? I have confidence.  My little homestead in the burbs, is going to work just fine for Hubs and I and our precious pups. 

Time to get busy... 

love and peace... 

rose gardens...

The sunrise this morning was breathtaking!  Looking outside now, it's almost impossible to believe that just 30 minutes ago the sky was on fire with beautiful blues, purples, pinks, yellows, and oranges.  It is now officially a gray soup with rain coming in. The beauty of it inspired me to finally get my seeds ordered, I have no idea why I have been stalling, but it was time to finally do it.  

I know that I will buy some of my plants from the local feed store, they all did fabulous for me last year, so I think that is probably the reason for the delay.  I always want to buy ALL the plants, I mean can one have too many?  The answer to that is yes, because unfortunately they all need usable real estate. Ask me how I know, I will definitely show you the packages of unused seeds that are past their prime and rarely germinate for me now. 

I am going to try lavender again this year, I am determined!  Every year or two I decided that I am growing it, everyone I know that has it has beautiful plants, they harvest so many beautiful fragrant bundles, me... nope.  Mine usually lasts for a few weeks and dies.  I'm not sure what I am doing wrong, heck my neighbor less than a quarter mile away harvests so many beautiful flowers, I just don't understand.  But, I do not believe in a no win scenario, so again this year I will try it. 

I'm fairly proud of myself, while I would love to tell you that I grow all of my plants from seed, the truth is, I kill more than I grow that way.  I don't have enough space to put them where they can safely germinate, maybe one day I will build myself a greenhouse (but probably not), until that day comes I prefer to support local greenhouses and buy my tomatoes, peppers and the like a bit more "grown".  I am struggling to decide if I am going to attempt adding zucchini again or not.  I have not been very successful growing that in pots. I feel I will be better off sticking with herbs and the basics. 

Who knows, this time of the year my heart definitely starts dreaming of bringing the treetop garden back to life.  The empty black pots actually make me a bit mopey and sad to see.  I want them vibrant and overflowing with life.  I hope to remember all of the marigold seeds I harvested the past two years to add to them mix this year and my girlfriend gave me a small ton of Rose of Sharon seeds.  I want to get a couple of those germinating soon, my poor Rose of Sharon trees have taken such a beating from where they were planted by the previous owners on the side of the hill and I am simply not sure how much more damage they will receive when we get our fence installed. Hopefully I will be able to grow them large enough to transplant around the fence and that the deer will choose to eat something else. 

Sweet Hubs reached out to the guy that redid the deck, he is going to come and give us a couple of bids to decide on for the fence.  We were considering using metal like the neighbors fence, but I really feel I would prefer a wooden fence, a bit more my style. With enough space the babies can observe the world, but sturdy enough to protect them.  

Well, before I head off to spend time with my girl and while the pups are still snoozing, I think I am going to do a few more chores and get ready for the day... I can't be the only one suffering through a bit of spring fever, it's been brown and dreary for far too long... 

love and peace... and springtime dreams!

silence...

Anyone else cherish the sound of silence?  Me and my aching head are seriously enjoying sitting here with Puppies asleep in my chair (yep, I moved - not disturbing them right now), no music, no sounds from outside, nothing but silence.  To the point that all I can hear is the sound of the keys being tapped and the soft ringing sound of silence in my ears. 

I'm so tired of this headache.  My sister says I need to see a chiropractor, she is probably right, but I don't have one that I see and I simply don't feel like playing the find one that is good and starting from scratch game.  I keep telling Hubs I need a massage, for some reason for the past few weeks everything is hurting again.  I try not to buy into the 5G hysteria, but something changed recently, and I can't figure out what it is.  Maybe I need to see an energy healer?  I don't know, but this low grade headache is definitely wearing on my nerves and patience.  It's making me grouchy.  

I might end up scheduling a deep tissue massage very, very soon. Anyone know of a holistic doc anywhere?  Oh well, first world problems right?

It will be a quiet day here, everyone is working somewhere else, so it's just me and the pups.  The beautiful sunshine is trying to trick me into spring fever, making me want to dig into my garden beds and feel the dirt under my nails.  That is still a few weeks or maybe months away.  The 59 degree weather next week will only make it worse.  I wish I had a cold box, then I could at least start the microgreens, lettuces and even some radishes.  But the way my yard is there really isn't anyway to put up a cold box.  Such a bummer. 

As we worked to clean up the deck yesterday, I realized I do not want to put up another structure to block the sun.  I love the shade out there making it wonderful to sit and enjoy the fresh air, but frankly, I love how clean and open it looks without all of that. I was standing out there last night and could actually see all the deer down the hill.  Nothing was blocking my view of the stars or moon, it was absolutely heavenly. So Hubs and I are going to explore alternatives, maybe an umbrella for those brutally hot days or when it is raining softly in the springtime and we want to enjoy the weather. 

We've also officially decided to put up a fence.  The pups are going to need it.  There is a lot of debate about how much of the yard to fence, the style of fencing, etc.  Our yard is an odd shape and the majority of it goes straight down a steep hill, we don't want to have to deal with that situation, so we are going to look at it a bit differently.  We also need to be aware that depending on how we fence it we will no doubt need two gates as the back of the house is not designed to allow access of the mower, you simply have to go in a "u" shape around the house. So much to consider, this is one of the reasons we never put one in before. I think I am going to leave the logistics to Hubs, I will be the one here to deal with it all, but he can contact and tell them the perimeters, this one calls for team work. 

Well, the rest and silence didn't last long today, the pups are awake and busy.  So I guess I will move on with my day.  Lots to do... 

love and peace...

moments...

Anyone else have a headache that simply doesn't want to go away?  Or is it just puppies... seriously, it's not my sweet puppies, but I have had a lingering headache for about a week, I am totally over it.  I am wondering if I need more electrolytes or if its the fact that mother nature seems to be totally off her rocker this past week.  It's been everywhere from 50 degrees down to 6 degrees and today it is edging back up.  Seriously?  The world has totally gone nuts! Weather - check, politics - check, economy - check, people - rapidly hitting that point. 

I finished my special project yesterday and I am so excited about it.  I don't know if it is a surprise, so I can't show you a picture of it, just in case. I felt so unbelievably blessed making it.  I haven't done a project like that for literally years, it filled my heart to overflowing.   I needed that blessing yesterday.  My mood had been a bit dark and weary. I can't wait to show you it.  I am hoping I get to do more of them for other people.  It was so much fun. I'll show you next week. 

Today, I have got to knuckle down and start streamlining my chores around puppy messes.  The house feels like a non-stop disaster and I simply cannot take it anymore.  I think it is strongly contributing to my current fussy state.  I had gotten quite content to have my house clean and organized, I had a method to my madness, now I feel like I am back in the scramble to survive place that I was when I worked full time.  Because training and raising two beautiful babies is definitely a full time job. I think the only thing I have consistently managed to do is vacuum, sweep and mop floors.  

It's definitely time to organize my world. My day to day routine needs revisited, when am I going to do chores, when am I going to complete projects, blog, get my inventory going for my business?  I mean... seriously when? I haven't even updated my to do list in a couple of weeks.  By the time I remember my calendar I am off on another puppy chase or squeezing in something I have forgotten. 

I'm sleeping on mommy's lap, even if I don't fit!

I am still working on cleaning out closets, cupboards and all the other little spaces that I have been stashing stuff.  I am going to be making another delivery to my sister.  Anything she doesn't use, I know that someone in her church will. She belongs to a small congregation, they all look out for one another. Hubs is working on his closets too, it's simply time.  We've both lost too much weight to keep the clothing we have and frankly, I think out of sheer consumerism and desperation to survive life, we simply bought too much.  I have wanted a pocket wardrobe for a long time now, and I am working on creating just that very thing.  

I am working on cleaning out so much stuff, throughout our home and garage.  I prefer to actually give it to someone that needs it, but I am struggling with finding homes for so much of it, I think we have all just consumered ourselves to extremes.  Each time another bag of stuff leaves I feel a sense of relief.  I feel lighter. It's strange and I don't know how else to explain it. Definitely helps when keeping up with the puppies.  Now my crafting space - that one is going to be challenging.  I never want to part with stuff up there.  Instead of giving that away, the goal is going to be to use it up!  We'll see how that goes around the puppies schedules.   

Well, puppies have drifted back to sleep so it is time for me to tackle another project, I might even get some knitting done today.  I really want to finish this sweater. I also need to book the first comping trip of the year - Hannibal here we come!

love and peace...