busy kind of day...

I don't know how I keep doing it, but boy do the weekends fly past.  I mean I don't go to work on Monday, shouldn't they feel like any other day? Yet here it is 4 pm on Sunday and I have no idea where the weekend has flown off to. I still need to finish tidying the kitchen - I cleaned out my soaping closet, so I still have a few things that need to get tossed.  

I was going to make a couple of batches of soap this weekend, but somehow... poof... not only did it not get done, but I also don't intend to do it, not today.  I'm tired. There is always tomorrow.  Now that my soaping supplies are organized, I can honestly say that I am excited to get some made. I know where everything is, what I have for supplies (what I have way too much of), it feels so great to be organized finally.  

I keep organizing and getting rid of stuff and it feels like I am not getting ahead.  For each room I finish, it feels like the others are breeding or something.  I know it isn't the case, but it certainly feels never ending.  I guess it is probably more linked to the fact that as you get an area completely the way you want it, you decide there is more clutter (getting rid of stuff is slightly intoxicating) and it's time to dig in deeper. 

It also helps me feel in control around the puppy chaos, because there is a lot of puppy chaos! And yes I am guilty as sin, I am not even going to try and pawn it off on Hubs, he helps, but I am fairly certain it is mostly me spoiling these little fur balls. 

Anyone else spending their weekend creating order out of chaos?  Digging out of snow?  Or have you mastered the art of enjoying the weekend?  

I'm not saying we haven't enjoyed our weekend.  We have found time each day to go for beautiful walks in the snow with our babies.  Beau is addicted.  Belle loves the walks now that it is warmer, she is always bouncing along looking for new scents to enjoy. 

The weight of the snow took out my gazebo on Friday. Hubs and I did not enjoy cleaning that mess up, but the pups are in heaven.  Their own private snow mountains.  Not so sure I will replace the gazebo, I loved the shade, but the deck sure feels bigger now that there is nothing blocking the view. We'll see.  I definitely have time to think about it and can always put an umbrella up again if I want shade. 

Right now I am envisioning the way I can make the treetop garden more inviting and what plants I want to plant.  I will be home enough to take care of a vegetable garden again this year and there are a few interesting plants that I am exploring. Hubs and I really like okra and I have found some interesting varieties that I might try growing.  I've never had pink or purple okra before.  I also want to plant vegetables that will be yummy with the cheeses I will be making. I am definitely considering french radishes, cucumbers, and maybe even some carrots to go with the tomatoes and peppers.  Those are non-negotiable and I am definitely planting more cayenne peppers - one can never have too many red pepper flakes. 

Well... as much as I want to sit here daydreaming and watching the deer frolic in the snow, I need to get with it.  A friend is coming over with his daughter to play with the puppies and Hubs needs a haircut shortly. 

love and peace...

begin...

This silence is almost deafening.  The occasional whoosh of the washer, the rain pouring down on the roofs, and the crackle of thunder and lightening is all that is breaking it. This is the first time I have ever been 100% alone in this house for two full days. 

Sweet Hubs headed out about two hours ago, he will be at the lodge until tomorrow night. A group of them are volunteering their time and skills to help get things ready for the upcoming summer. He asked me to come along, and I seriously considered it.  I love working on renovation projects, but it wasn't what my heart was calling for.  

I chose to listen to my heart. 

I wandered out on the deck to see if I could get my herbs planted this morning.  Nope, not unless I want a cold shower to go with it.  And truthfully, I don't.  I'm sort of wishing I'd skipped the nap I needed so badly yesterday and gotten everything planted.  Hopefully the rain will let up and I can get them in the pots today.  We'll see, if not well they are well watered and have been living in pots for a good while, they will be just fine. 

I managed to get a beautiful pot of cilantro, I had almost given up hope.  The garden center had everything except a decent pot of cilantro.  They had some tiny pots with a single sprig growing in the middle, definitely not enough to actually use for cooking until some time late this summer.  Ironically, Home Depot had a huge pot, just needs transplanted and we are ready to go. 

It feels odd to have so much time to do what I love and cherish.  It's been so very long.  I am feeling a bit stuck.  Not in a bad way, but definitely in an overwhelmed way. So many things have been neglected and ignored.  So much that I want to tackle and I have this urge to tackle it all at once.  I realize that is unreasonable and well... impossible... but dang I wish that magic wand I have upstairs worked. I don't think I have enough patience to wait for it all to be completed. 

So much has opened up and changed in the past week and it feels freeing and peaceful. I'm sure at some point it might become stressful, but right now, nope!  Electronic leash is cut, I am opening my heart and mind to so much that has been locked away.  

It feels like an eternity since I was able to simply be. I have always said when I retire I am putting a hot pink stripe in my hair.  I will admit I'm considering it, very seriously. I might actually do it eventually, right now I am afraid to do anything that might cause more of it to fall out.  The look of shock on my dear sweet Hubs face yesterday when I told him I was thinking about it, well, it was absolutely priceless. He almost choked on his lunch.  I have told him this for literally years, he thought I was joking. I don't know if I am. 

He pointed out to me that he'd always wanted a fifties housewife, I pointed out he probably got more of a hybrid hippie model. I don't know.  I'm more a blue jeans, over sized shirt, long hair, pioneer type gal.  Not so much high heels, pearls and perfect hair. I can play in either playground, but my heart... will always be more of a Mother Earth free spirit, than a June Cleaver perfection model.  He knew that when he married me.

This slower pace feels heavenly.  I can feel my stress levels dropping almost by the moment.  I am not sure that I am the driven woman that my inner me has always told me I am.  Having time to sit in the sunshine and work on a knitting project with tall glass of ice water yesterday felt like a vacation.  I was simply sitting in my treetop garden, not some exotic locale and it was wonderful. 

I am finding my emotional health is priceless.  The balance and grace of the day, beautiful.  I'm not sure I will spend much time connected to any electronics these next two days.  I have things I want to do and not having to have screen time is probably my favorite thing ever!

We are going to be participating in the subdivision yard sale and for the first time, I have time.  

There is so much that I would love to purge from our home.  Things that we no longer need or use.  Items that have been replaced or upgraded.  Stuff that has been hanging around in boxes and back closets - I mean come on our kids are all grown - why do I even have twin bed supplies?

There are books that served a purpose at one point in time, they no longer do.  Furniture that isn't needed and dishes that were being saved for... well who knows.  

Generally speaking, I loathe yard sales.  Hubs loves them.  So I will get it all ready and then let him tackle the "day of" stuff.  I just want my home to feel as free of clutter as I do. 

My weary soul feels like this is self-care.  It is needed. I haven't had time for a good spring cleaning in over a decade, even moving I simply boxed up the clutter and moved it on.  I am filled with joy at the prospect of cleaning it all out. 

I guess my plan for self-care these next two days has nothing to do with long baths, candles and wine... well maybe I can squeeze those in also, sure sounds inviting.  

Today, I think I will tackle the kitchen while I wait for the rain to stop and I get to spend a bit more time up in the dirt.  The thought of getting my kitchen cleaned and organized is enough to make me giddy.  I love to cook.  I hate to look for stuff. Definitely feels like a win/win. Hubs favorite thing is a home cooked meal, he is over the moon that he will start being able to enjoy those every day, a clean and organized kitchen makes it so much easier.

Well, my coffee is cold, it's time to begin.  

I'll chat with you later... please remember to always do what makes your soul feel peaceful, it's so healing.