simpler times...

Happy Monday!  Feeling a little proud of myself that I remembered what day it was, thank goodness Hubs needs clean laundry for the work week, or I might have forgotten. The weather is supposed to be absolutely delightful today, so I am planning to take full advantage of it and clean up the front and back gardens.  It's time.  The cold snap last week pretty much did all of the beauty and bounty in for the year. I hate seeing it, but, we all know it is inevitable. 

Since I'm writing this morning, we can all see that I survived the insanity of me getting into the little boat yesterday.  Honestly, after the first 30 minutes of pure terror and panic it was great fun. I love to be out in nature, so a few hours tooling around the lake in in our little boat was heaven (after I got over being terrified I was going to end up in the lake). I had great fun practicing my casting for a few hours, I might like to show Hubs that I can cast just as well as he can.  We caught a ton of sea salad if you are into that kind of thing, long strands of every shade of green imaginable.  

Honestly, I probably spent more time capturing pictures, enjoying the beautiful cloud formations (so many of them looked like angels doing battle) and simply sitting quietly enjoying the absolute beauty that surrounded us on all sides.  It was a bit breezy, so the lake was sparkling like it was covered in millions of diamonds.  It was the perfect way to enjoy the gift of a warm mid-fall day. 

We'd also stopped and visited with the horses.  Hubs had checked in with the ranch director, a good friend of ours, and she told him that he could take them carrots and apples.  They usually discourage guests from feeding them, as they could get nipped, but Hubs was raised around horses and she knew that.  Watching his smile and the joy that radiated off of him as he nuzzled up to them, scratching their noses and ears and talking to them filled my heart to almost bursting.  I wish we had a small farm where he could have horses, they seem to know instinctively that he is a friend.  I even tried my hand at feeding a couple of them, I am not at all confident around horses.  At all.  The one and only time I ever rode one or even was close to them was our wedding.  I am more of the "let me enjoy you from afar", kind of horse person.  Although I definitely enjoyed scratching a few noses myself. 

Our plans for a short day on the lake lingered on far later than we expected and the early sunset had us both feeling a little lost. I mean what happened to the day?  But we had to stop and see our friends new house (read mansion) that they are building.  It is going to be breathtaking when finished!  Surrounded by 40 beautiful acres of peaceful forest and trails.  I asked if there was going to be a barn for horses, the answer was a resounding YES!  As soon as we drove through the gate we knew that had to be their paradise.  It was. I am so very happy for them. 

All of our lingering meant that we didn't get home until well after dark, but to watch the sunset over those rolling hills was definitely worth it!

We might have played most of the weekend.  No serious work was accomplished, we simply enjoyed life.  It was fabulous.  I knew that all too soon today would come and both Hubs and I would sink back into work.  I know I joke (maybe) about forgetting the day of the week, but I do truly work quite a bit more than I did in the traditional work system, it's just different. 

Today will have me finishing the piecing and placing a quilt on the longarm, tidying gardens, doing laundry, paying bills, cooking (for us and our friend), planning for the winter ahead, cleaning out closets and starting to process the news that keeps coming out from our natural gas supplier. 

I don't know if anyone outside the St. Louis area will be affected and I am still questioning how the gas was supplied successfully prior to 2019 but is in danger now, but according to Spire and the news it appears that our gas supply could be cut off on December 13, unless they are successful at delaying the lawsuit against them. 

I am also questioning why a group in New York is so concerned about St. Louis' natural gas supply that they have filed a lawsuit to cut it off and why a judge would rule on a random date of December 13 (right as the weather is crazy cold) to do so. 

As all of those things are out of my control, I am simply going to start planning "for the if come" as my Daddy used to always say. As our house has gas heat, stove, and hot water it could be a bit cool around here. Not to mention I will be making a lot more meals in a non-traditional way.  Luckily our house is very insulated and we do own some electric space heaters, we also have the fireplace.  Spire says we will still have some natural gas, but will be asked to make some sharp cuts to help prevent a shortage.  So using less heat, not cooking with gas, etc.  

Like I said, something about the entire thing smells funny to me.  This pipeline has only been operational since late 2019, and we sure had natural gas prior to that.  Hubs feels it will hit Spire in the pocketbook and they don't want to lose any of their profits, so make the consumers suffer.  

Frankly, I am getting weary of all the small squeezes (that are getting bigger all the time) that are being placed on us, that are causing pain and a feeling of lack.  I am tired of the rich getting richer and people seeming to be blind.  Gas is stupid high, hard to believe in January it was around $1.75 a gallon and here we are in November and it's an average of $3.18 a gallon.  But that is what happens when you deliberately take away energy independence.  And groceries... everything is shrinking in size and rising in prices, if you can find what you are looking for at all. 

None of this is normal, nor does it appear to be random.  This isn't the first time in history things like this have happened, and it sadly won't be the last.  There are always going to be the rich and powerful trying to get further ahead on the backs of those that have less. If it is uncomfortable and tight for those of us in the middle think about those that were struggling to begin with. 

At some point we all need to come together and pull ourselves out of these messes, but again sadly there are still too many that have their heads stuck in the sand and can't see the forest for the trees. 

While we were out in the country this weekend, I was in awe of the strength of the people we were around.  They didn't have tons of money, they are simply self-reliant.  They have wells, septic, plans for things like heating oil shortages (so many piles of wood), they aren't relying on the local grocery to provide their food, their small backyard farms (or big ones in some cases) have provided bounty that is probably sitting in their pantries in mason jars bright and colorful.  No added preservatives for them in those beautiful jars.  Their freezers are stocked with wild game, beef, chicken and pork straight from the farm.  

Everyone of them we talked to were talking about their wild turkey's already ready for the holidays ahead, they aren't worried about a possible turkey shortage and then the subsequent financial rape to purchase one.  One of the guys was telling Hubs about the wild turkey's he was going to be smoking this week, and offering to give him some. 

When we were wandering the craft shows down there, I admit I was disappointed, but I guess that I should truly clarify that statement.  I was disappointed, because I am able to do all of what we saw, there was nothing I needed to purchase. The booths were full of things that I am currently making, that I can do for us myself. 

We took some of my soaps down to share with friends that we have made over the years.  They always give us some jerky and sausage.  I like "horse trading" as Hubs puts it. 

I think that is some of the magic those folks have that us "city folk" have forgotten. In my heart it feels like that is some of what the folks worrying about supply shortages are missing. 

I'm not worried too much about the natural gas issue, we have plenty of nice warm hand knit wool socks to keep our feet warm.  We have cozy hats and sweaters.  I can always put another quilt on the bed and a log on the fire. It will be a huge inconvenience, but it will be okay. 

The more self-reliant we become, the less we are at the mercy of those that don't have our best interests at heart. 

If we had caught fish yesterday, the game plan was to give them to the guys in the maintenance department, let them have a fish fry.  They are so kind and thoughtful to Hubs and I, that it would be the very least we can do.  I like the way that folks down there share their skills and bounty.  I hope it spreads like a pandemic to every area.  Every place I have ever lived that I have felt comfortable and like I belonged has been like that. 

People share skills, they teach one another, they lift each other up.  People share their bounty, their meals and their supplies.  And I truly mean share.  It isn't taken from one and given to another, it is a system of informal trading to help meet the needs of everyone.  Maybe I give you soaps and you give me tomatoes, or I make you a quilt for your bed and you provide me with something wood worked? I teach you a skill and you teach me one I do not have.  The examples are endless. Can you imagine the power of the people if all of us could reach that point.  

Can you imagine the power of an economy based on all of us working together?  Maybe you raise sheep or alpaca but you do not know how to spin, knit or crochet... so you provide me with bags of wool and I make you a winter sweater, or hats or mittens for the family in exchange. Where fair and equal value is assigned to the fruits of our labors... 

I know I daydream too much.  I know that I could easily go backwards in time to a place that could happen.  Where communities were truly communities.  Where the good of all was seen to by all.  The dangers of being raised on "the little house on the prairie" books. I guess. I will continue to pray for that utopia, and in the meantime, I will continue to just keep doing my odd ball stuff. If you ever need my help know that all you have to do is ask.  I will do whatever I can for you. 

I will keep planning, prepping, being ready for whatever comes our way and being okay with the journey as it happens. What about you?

love and peace...

accept the help...

Three weeks... almost on the dot.  I had just hit the recovery room exactly three weeks ago.  As I was standing up working on a small pile of ironing just now, I was marveling at how far I've come in three very short weeks. 

I am far from independent.  There are moments that my cane is my friend and my bed is an even better friend.  But most days I am able to walk independently of Hubs or the cane.  I can manage to navigate spaces and each day I am standing for longer periods of time.  

I can't say I sleep great, but I am sure that is a combination of several things.  I am one of those people that go to sleep in one position and rarely shift in the night, FYI - a leg recovering from major surgery is not a fan of staying in one position for more than 4 - 5 hours.  At which point it will wake me and force me to reconsider my sleeping choices.  Additionally, I miss my bed, each day I practice climbing in and out of it, I am hopeful by this weekend I can return to my personal nest.  I need my calming blues, my fans - not air conditioners, and the deeper darkness the back of the house provides. I also think that my new found habit of napping whenever the mood hits me is definitely not helping my ability to sleep more than 6 hours a night.  

Sweet Hubs is a very early riser, so we have had some great opportunities to enjoy each other's company.  Sitting in the treetop garden watching the world wake up.  Strolling for my walk in the wee hours of the morning, looking for shooting stars and admiring the beauty around us. And just talking.  I cherish time with this guy!

But most importantly, I am returning to feeling like a contributing human.  I am even slightly able to assist with meal prep and the like. 

Oh don't get me wrong, I still have massive fussy moments.  Where the frustration of wanting to do something completely overwhelms my rational mind and forces me into a pretty dark funk. I hit that spot a few times this past weekend.  It was beautiful out.  Hubs was doing yard work, and puttering around the house.  I was feeling useless. 

That sweet man does not believe in a no win situation.  Instead of telling me to simply enjoy resting, to sit a bit more and look longingly out the window, each day he found things that I could navigate, I could participate in and enjoy.  

He took me with him on errands and I figured out how to use the silly carts at the various shops we needed things from.  I can't say all of them instilled confidence and as someone that will only need them temporarily, I worry for those people that need to rely on them long term.  Maintenance people, geez.  

Instead of going into Michaels to pick up the few threads that I needed for my quilt block (which truthfully would have been much faster for him) he took me to pick it myself.  I knew I wouldn't be in there long and that I didn't need to go far, so my hardheadedness led me to simply walk slowly with my cane to my threads.  I did concede and let Hubs bend over for them, but let me assure you it was a difficult concession.  

I am not sure why it is so hard to ask for and accept help.  I used to get so mad at him for not allowing me to give him assistance as he dealt with both hip replacements and the battle with staph that came between.  I would be infuriated with his refusal for help when he desperately needed it.  Yet, here I am being the same ornery brat. In fact most folks I know will not ask for nor willingly accept help. Why do we do that?

I suffered a bit for my determination, but it was worth it, each day that I push through and push just a bit more I gain more movement and more independence.  I was only able to manage 100 yards the first walk down the road and back.  The last walk was 300 yards.  Each day a bit more opens up to me. 

I am a total outdoors freak if you haven't figured it out yet.  Not a fan of the extreme heat, but any chance I have to be outside fills my very life force.  Until yesterday I still wasn't strong enough to spend much time in my gardens and the tiny view from my assortment of chairs was definitely not fitting the bill.  So my sweet Hubs took me to Lone Elk Park.  I love to travel through and enjoy the beauty and solitude.  Searching through the vast openings in search of the deer, elk and bison can entertain me for hours. 

And this time it almost did.  As hot as it was you would not have anticipated so much activity from the occupants, but they were super busy!  The deer, elk and raccoons felt it was a great day to slowly parade up and down the roads, stopping traffic to admire their independence and pray that they didn't decide to ram your vehicle instead of pleasurably strolling past.  

The lake hasn't really recovered, but seems to be holding it's own, which is so important for those sweet animals and their survival.  We watched quite a few swirls, so at least some occupants of the lake survived the sink hole.  

The bison never cease to amaze me and we found most of them all gathered together in a deep shaded valley, not at all looking bothered by the 95+ temperatures.  The babies were so adorable, alternating between lying and standing, a couple were even rolling in the dust, trying to get rid of those pesky flies. 

The elk are something else all together.  There are often groups of them scattered randomly throughout the park.  We didn't see any of the really big guys with their full rack of antlers, who knows how deep into the stillness they had gone in search of relief.  We found a small group of ladies cooling in the shade overlooking the lake and a couple of other's off on their own adventures.  The little youngster just growing into his legs and antlers was hysterical and definitely had me sliding back into my seat a little further as he considered sticking his head in the window for a moment. 

I will probably never be brave enough to go to Lone Elk Park and have a picnic or hike.  I have a healthy respect for wild animals in their own space, I also don't do ticks, and the plethora of signs warning of heavy tick infestation is enough to insure I don't leave our truck. 

It's silly how something so simple as enjoying animals and nature can bring one back to center, but as usual it did.  I enjoyed spending time with Hubs enjoying the wildlife, the beauty of the surroundings and simply time together.  I know he had a ton of stuff he wanted to get done, so the fact that he went out of his way to make my weekend less confined was deeply appreciated. 

Shortly today I am going to head into my studio (I like how that sounds), I have several projects that need my attention and I am finally feeling mobile enough to start. I have to modify the way I will handle some of it, as I can't stand for very long, and ironing large pieces often requires that.  I'm pretty clever and I am sure I will figure out the way to modify it, I'm nothing if not creative and persistent. 

Lessons learned lately... accept the help...