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Showing posts from September, 2014

looking for the bright spots...

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Hard to believe it was 104 just a week and a half ago.  Hard to believe life was so different.

The past two mornings have been sweatshirt and jeans weather.  Chili and soups.  It's like someone turned the heat off over night.

It was 44 when I woke up this morning.  Snuggled deep in my king size bed with my old pup under that big down comforter.  It was exactly what I needed.

Yesterday I found myself struggling with all that has happened.  I am not so worried about the kids right now, I am worried about my girl.  She has a wonderful sweetie in her life that I know is keeping her sane and grounded.  For that I am unbelievably thankful and happy.  He brought tears to my eyes when I checked my phone this morning and saw the awesome pictures of their evening.  When I see him gently support my girls and goof around with the boys.  I am so thankful that God put a solid rock in her life to anchor to as she navigates this storm.

But she is like her mom and her grandma... she is going to …

the end of perfection...

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It's been over 36 hours since the world tilted on it's axis for us.  Yesterday was probably the hardest day for me to witness.  It hurt me to watch the boys coming to terms with their Daddy's death.  Watching my girls, that killed me.

I was so blessed yesterday.  Even though I knew what I was hiding from a sweet little princess, she didn't. I work with an incredible group of individuals and because of that I was able to spend the last day of my grand baby's innocence with her.  While Mommy and Grandpa dealt with the horrors and sorted out the bits and pieces of death.  I was able to love, spoil and enjoy a Gramma and Grand Baby day.

I had the wonderful gift to protect and prolong the perfection of her childhood.  We giggled, laughed, created, walked, talked, dreamed and schemed.  All the things that my angel loves to do we did.
We went to the doctor for her little ear, she is so mature and was able to answer all the questions a Gramma didn't know.  She was s…

Disbelief....

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I haven't had time to write lately.  This move has sapped everything I have to give.  It all screeched to a halt last night at dinner.

I'm still sitting here surrounded by boxes, there is still a ton of work to do both at home and at work.  But my focus for the immediate future is my girls and my grand sons.

My son-in-law has brought out some incredibly strong emotions in me over the past eleven years.  He's mad me madder than a wet hen, he's terrified me, he's made me feel terror and pure joy. I have loved him and despised him  With him there really has never been any middle ground.  Now is no exception.

At dinner yesterday we got a call that we all expected to get one day, but prayed would never come.  I watched my girl crumple as she paced while talking on the phone.  Scurried around (over protective momma that I am) to get my grand baby safely away before any more words were said.  Grampa whisked her to our house for a night of movies and sillies.

I forgot the…