kaleidoscopes...

Do you remember the distinctive sound of the kaleidoscope when you turned it.  The soft sound of the bits moving into another form of themselves? I know they still make them, I saw one at the End of the Commons, when we visited there.  I actually almost bought one.  My fingers slid softly over it, I didn't understand why I was being drawn to it.  

Yesterday, our personal kaleidoscope flipped to another scenario again.  We are in a holding pattern, no surprise there.  I almost have to laugh.  Growing up a military brat, becoming a military spouse and now the wife of a veteran there is a phrase that you hear often.  Hurry up and wait.  Funny how true it is. Even once you move into the civilian world.  And we are currently navigating both worlds and hoping they line up properly.

Hubs shoulder is a bit more of a mess than we thought.  Correction, it is a lot more of a mess than we thought. The original fix is off the table.  When a surgeon informs you that they wouldn't consider it for a member of their own family, you probably need to listen.  But of course there is always a plan b.  And Plan B it is.  We are waiting to find out when the schedule will allow it, but Hubs is going to have to have a reverse Shoulder replacement.  Part of it sounds far more intense, but a bigger part of it sounds like a far better solution with an incredible outcome.  For today we wait. Did you hear it shift?

There have been a lot of shifts lately and I'm just trying really hard to process them all.  

Around 10 years ago, I had the absolute great honor of getting ready to opening a new facility.  With what was arguably the greatest team of people imaginable. It was bright, welcoming and beautiful.  We worked together so well, laughter was usually the language of the day. Shortly after returning home from Pennsylvania, I received word that hurt my heart.  It was something I have expected since opening day, but dreaded seeing just the same. 

I don't have words to describe the sense of loss of something that I walked away from a very long time ago.  But it was there just the same.  As I read the texts, and talked to one of the people that had been part of our team, tears streamed down my cheeks.  That building was very significant for me.  I put far more blood, sweat and tears into it than anything else in recent memory.  It ate up time I could have spent with my Dad as he was dying, it took precious time from my family and it was all consuming.  

I've spent the past almost two weeks processing, coming to terms with something that I always knew was inevitable.  I am going to make time soon to go visit before it closes for good.  I will probably take a few pictures to remember it.  Who knows.  I haven't been back since I left, it was far too painful of a feeling.  It had been very important to me.  I fought hard for it.  I gave up so very much.  I remember sitting in my office sobbing when I found out I was moving to a different location.  It was so very important to me. As with all things, I put it behind me.  Allowed time to seal it off from my memories.  Moved on with life.  Now all of it is a bittersweet memory that occasionally comes to visit.  

Most of that incredible group of people have either scattered or passed away.  Time does that.  Some live far away, others live close, but the tie that bound us together has frayed.  It definitely breaks my heart to think of it.  At the same time, I am so incredibly grateful for that time.  For the people.  For the opportunity.  For the memories that will continue to seep through as time goes on. 

Yep, that kaleidoscope definitely shifted a lot with that news, moving forward and snapping backwards, trying to focus itself. 

My life is so very different now.  It's calmer, things rarely send our kaleidoscope spinning.  Right now, it's not so calm.  It's moving fairly rapidly, bringing the next beautiful lens into place. There are lessons we are learning, opportunities that we are taking advantage of and others waiting to be explored.  There is healing, adjusting and restructuring taking place all in the same breaths. 

At moments it feels exciting, at other moments it all feels overwhelming, and unsteady.  For people that thrive on steady and rhythmic flows to life... well... let's just say our cheese has been moving around a lot lately. 

I'm working on something that for me feels big.  It feels a lot like the feelings of opening that facility felt.  There is uncertainty.  There are doubts and questions.  Yet, each moment feels like another step forward. 

Conundrum is the word that snapped into my mind this morning around 5 am, and it has been living there ever since.  I was sitting and knitting, watching the needles moving swiftly around my fingers, laughing at the remains of polish that I am hesitant to removed because I don't want to damage my nails. The bright red tips clashing with or complimenting the deep forest green yarn of my sweater. 

Conundrum.  

It was there the entire time I was doing yard work, cleaning up the kitchen and showering.  Like a drumbeat.  I'm sure it will linger a bit longer, until I figure how the next steps in what I am considering.  It's pointing out to me the absurdity of what I am thinking of.  

I am a deeply introverted person.  At the same moment, I absolutely love people.  

Sounds like a great theme for a drama or comedy doesn't it.  Instead, it is simply the story of my life.  It is where the stumbling blocks lie. 

Maybe tomorrow I will have more answers.  Maybe the path will be clearer.  But for today... I have peppers to harvest.  Some will find their way to the dehydrator to make a unique pepper flake mixture.  Some will either be pickled or candied - haven't decided yet.  I have seeds to plant while we have this freaky extended summer.  And I have a list of other things.  All of them will lend themselves to the next part of the journey.  The question is how... 

Darn there it is again... Conundrum... 

Gotta run... 

much love, 

b

living life!

Time often slips away from me.  Not from bad things, but simply from living an incredible life.  I am often busier than I realize, again not in a bad way, but in a fulfilling and energizing way.  This morning I am sitting here, relaxing for a few minutes in front of the warmth of the fire that my sweet Hubs built for me as I was very cold for some reason.  

I won't linger for long.  I do have a lot to catch up on, again, I've let time swiftly sneak away from me.  The pups and I have been doing a lot of walks and hikes, we've climbed a few "mountains" to us, high hills if you live in the mountains.  The climbs were intense, but invigorating.  Hubs has even been able to join us a bit more and he definitely did a full hill climb with us.  We have discovered that we really love going to the Rockwoods Conservation Area about 25 minutes away.  

In fact I am pretty sure we will go today.  There is a 2.5 mile trail that I have been longing to try out. Until we try it, I don't want to take Hubs.  Too many hills aren't great for his back while he is healing. And healing he is.  Although there is another trail just 15 minutes from our house that was pretty darn incredible and we could tackle the whole thing today, I wimped out last time... Oh the decisions.  

Emmenegger Nature Park

Emmenegger Nature Park

He opted out of surgery for his back.  Too many doctors want to go that route straight away.  Thankfully, he was assigned to an incredible pain management doctor.  We both love him!  The last thing he suggested was surgery, in fact he advised against it.  He asked for 90 days.  Ninety days to use natural methods, movement, water therapies, diet, walking, and ultimately a few injections to help with the journey.  Discussions are always around the proper shoes, what to eliminate from his diet, movements that will accelerate healing and strength.  

Rockwood Conservation Area
1/3 of the way up on Trail among the Trees

My focus for Beau this year was to get him healthier, to hopefully prevent another seizure ever.  Belle and I are benefitting from supporting our boys.  We are both getting stronger and healthier right along with them. 

naptime... this mom is crazy

Meramec Greenway -
Arnold Grove Trail

Moonshine Hallow Trail
 - St. Francois State Park 

They say you should always be learning and trying new things to prevent yourself from a wide assortment of ailments both mental and physical.  I'm gonna say we are on it this year. 

St. Francois State Park - just us

This morning as I was fixing Hubs lunch and prepping things that I will work on today, that thought was echoing through my head.  In a few I will get dressed and take my babies hiking.  But when we get home I have a busy day lined up.  By then the chickpeas will have soaked long enough to be canned and processed.  I need to prep a couple of batches of ice cream so I can use up my heavy cream, before I get the fresh batch.

I will start the yogurt tonight, because last night got wonky and I forgot. I'll put it on before we head out to pick up this weeks order from the farm. I am still in awe of how much I love fresh raw milk.  We have definitely had an amazing benefit taken away from us for far too long. 

Tomorrow I will finish the batch of french butter that is fermenting on the counter.  I am so intrigued by it.  The more I learn about fermented foods the more obsessed I become about incorporating it in our daily meals. 

I guess I am learning things on a regular basis.  

Tomorrow I am stepping out of my comfort zone and taking a class.  I don't need the whole class, but I will definitely take advantage of the opportunity it provides.  I'm going out to the August A. Busch Memorial Conservation Center to take a class.  I don't often do group anything and definitely not with complete strangers, on my own.  But here we are.  

Nature knitting with natural dyes... the title alone lured me in.  The course description sealed the deal.  It isn't about the knitting for me, as it is a learning to knit type scenario, but the natural dies... I'm in paradise.  They are going to teach us how to use things found in nature... pokeberries, pawpaw leaves and goldenrod flower heads oh my... to create natural dyes for yarn.  The fact that it was free was an even stronger motivation for me. Probably coupled by the fact that I have quite a bit of natural alpaca roving and a few skeins of natural fibers waiting for the chance to be vibrant and exciting.  Okay, that last bit is hysterical coming from a woman who's main wardrobe is multi-shades of black. 

I am a bit of a knowledge junkie.  I love to learn and experience new things.  

My learning journey is helping me to replace the disposable things, the chemically treated things, the toxic bi-products that we are taught are good for us, with things that truly are. Will I ever be able to replace it all, at this point in my life, probably not.  Can I minimize the impact on our lives and health, why yes I do believe so. 

There are many things that I would love the ability to have and do, I mean access to a nice deep well... come on what crazy woman doesn't dream of that?  A flock of laying hens?  Well, duh.  Seems a bit of a stretch for someone that lives in a HOA in suburbia.  So I'll take the small wins.  

Almost the peak of Trail among the Trees
Yup I was too afraid
to be that close to the edge

Rockwood Conservation Area

Moonshine Hallow Trail

Hikes amongst the trees and streams, just outside of the city limits.  Buying real food from a farmer, instead of the grocery store.  Growing and preserving what I can.  You get the idea.  Slowly the plastics and the unnatural fibers are leaving us.  

It's all about what fills your spirit.  This fills mine.  The healing, the recovery from a system I don't feel we were truly meant to be part of.  

I love this journey. 

Well, the fire is fading down to wispy embers, my toes are nice and warm.  It's time to start prepping for the hike.  Waters to fill, pups to get a dusting with food grade DE (Beau had a tick on him this morning... didn't know they could live in the cold temperatures - I was wrong evidently) and then we will spend some time walking in the forest.  Soaking up all that surrounds us and fills us with energy. 

I guess I'll decide where we are going as we leave the driveway.  But there are only two amazing days left before the predicted rains start falling.  I am positive that I will not go hiking in the hills in the rain, walking with two strong dogs requires me to have strong safe footing.  During the rains we will walk local. 

Have a blessed day, strive to learn and master something new every day.  It's so empowering.  

much love, 

b

time in the garden...

I guess I could complain like everyone seems to be doing about the heat.  I am definitely not a fan of hot weather. Instead I am choosing to be grateful.  I am thankful for the air conditioning and the fans that keep our house nice and cool.  I am sure that it definitely does help my gratefulness.  If I were hot non-stop, I think I might struggle with gratitude.  

Instead, I can wander out into my treetop garden and celebrate the fact that the heat is creating the need to harvest several times a day. I am able to keep my dehydrator filled and running almost non-stop right now.  The cayenne peppers are bountiful this year and each time I walk outside it seems like more of them are vibrant red.  This is the first year that I have had more than five or six to last throughout the year.

I'm trying out something new with the abundance of cherry tomatoes.  I've sliced them at a quarter inch and sprinkled them with the garlic salt, made from the scapes. They are in the dehydrator now, if all goes well, they will dry and become a slightly chewy chip. Fingers crossed. And if they aren't something we like as a snack, they are definitely something I can toss into various recipes, just like the powder I made from the dehydrated tomato skins. 

I'm did most of my Monday chores yesterday, I have a lot going on this week.  I was given a couple of bags cucumbers and decided to make cinnamon pickles.  Sometimes known as Christmas pickles. I've never tried them, but when you have an entire sink full of slightly larger cucumbers you need to come up with some use for them. 

I didn't realize they took 5 days before coming to an actual canning stage.  Day two was the most labor intensive if you don't count peeling a sink full of cucumbers.  We won't be able to taste them until day 4 at the soonest.  Hopefully, I am not wasting an incredible amount of time and they are as delicious as everyone says they are.  After all, we were pretty darn happy with the pickled brussel sprouts, and they sure didn't sound all that good. 

Waste not, want not.  

when a squirrel does the planting 
they know nothing about spacing...

All of these blistery hot days are definitely paying off.  It looks like one of the squirrels decided to plant a few tomato plants for me.  I'm debating on what I am going to do with the little volunteer plants that have popped up. I definitely don't have enough bed space to let them all grow, although I absolutely despise pulling them and letting them die. I have no idea which ones are growing, although I am pretty sure that we have enough warm weather ahead for at least another harvest before this season ends. Based on where they are located I am guessing either a cherry tomato or a chocolate cherry tomato.  Both have produced wonderfully. 

cherry tomatoes

Hungarian sweet peppers

gypsy peppers

mini peppers

jalapenos... soon to be jelly

Hubs and I spent the late afternoon in the garden.  Cleaning it up, weeding, tying up tomatoes (did I mention that the tomatoes are going crazy this year?) pruning here and there all the little things that help it continue to produce so well.  I think I am going to fertilize today and plant a few more cow peas.  That should wrap it up.  

I have two more bags of potatoes to check on, they might even be ready to harvest.  Then it's time to decide what I am planting for fall in those bags.  Part of me wants more potatoes, but then I start to consider some beets.  I'm also getting ready to plant the fall lettuces again.  As the season starts to change there are more shaded areas where they will grow well.  Maybe some onions?  And I am waiting slightly impatiently to plant my garlic for next spring. 

The garden definitely consumed the greater part of yesterday.  It's all good, if it hadn't that would mean it isn't thriving. 

not sure why Belle thinks she's a fern...
or why she is in the planter...

Thankfully the weather has cooled a bit today, so it will not be so miserable when I head out to mow the grass.  After I finish the morning chores I will head up to the sewing room for a bit.  I didn't get much made this weekend and need to refocus myself. We headed to a few antique shops and found a few more feed sacks and vintage embroidery work.  My goal is to have 20 of the beautiful pin cushions made by Wednesday.  Shouldn't be hard.  Then I am going to mix it up a bit, I want to create thread catchers/pin cushions with them.  

I bought a very plain one at a quilt show not long ago and I am in LOVE.  I take it with me everywhere that I will be crafting.  It has completely changed my frustration level when doing hand work. I will make a small assortment of those before moving on to the next project.  I can't believe we are already moving into August. 

Tomorrow is the eldest daughter's birthday.  Mine will follow a few days later and then my beautiful grand daughter is two days later.   She and I will do something together to celebrate this year.  I am so thankful for that.  She growing up so fast that before long my sweet girl will be off living her own life and that day between birthday celebration will become the stuff memories are made of. 

I haven't forgotten about 2 Timothy 4:3-4, I'm simply still processing it.  It ties in so soundly with the message that pastor shared yesterday on John 9.  So many thoughts are swirling in my head and I need time to process, maybe ask a few questions.  I am finding the more I think I understand, the more I need to question, the more connections and truths I am finding.  Talk about sliding down rabbit holes. 

Well the sun is starting to rise, soon it will be time to take care of outside chores, so I'd better get busy and finish the inside one. Time is wasting... And I don't wish to waste the blessings from the father...

love and prayers... b

the calming...

The first fire of the season is warming my toes, the crackling is so soothing to my spirit and soul.  Perfect way to spend this cold autumn Sunday morning.  Hubs offered to make me one outside, I wimped out, 40° is just too cold for an enjoyable bonfire.  Thank goodness for my fireplace.  

I haven't really been in a good spot for writing lately.  There is so much going on in the world that I've adopted more of a non-participatory stance.  Observing and watching quietly from my small corner of life. I've been busy with all of the things that are important to us. 

This morning, I'm enjoying the fire before I get busy for the day.  Autumn is definitely here and I have been a bit lazy.  It's time to put up more soups, I picked up some beautiful butternut squash the other day at the market, some of them are destined to become soup.  Some will be roasted and other's will simply be cubed and canned to roast at a later date.  I also have an entire bushel of apples to tackle.  Hubs was doing a darn good job of wiping out my applesauce stash.  When things are in season you make the most of it. 

As it warms today, I am going to harvest what is left of the green beans, okra, tomatoes and peppers, those will all find their way into soups.  It's getting really cool at night already, the forecast is dipping into the mid-thirties at night, before long we will have frost.  I'd hate to waste any of my hard work.  

I'm considering trying to over winter a few of my pepper plants.  I've seen several great video's and articles on how to do it.  They all did so well this year that I would definitely like to give it a try. Just not sure where I will let them hang out.  I might see if Hubs has any window space left in the man cave.  If it works it would be a complete game changer in terms of how long I have to wait each year for them to finally bud and produce fruit.  Who knows maybe someday I will give in and build a greenhouse. 

I'm fairly sure between soups simmering on the stove, the soft cinnamon and apple smells and the fireplace, our house if going to be filled with the smells that simply provide comfort and a sense of calm. 

This truly is my favorite season of the year.  I like all of them to varying degrees, but this one, while being the ending of the cycle before the winter rest always feels like a beginning to me. Maybe I associate it with the start of the school year, making it a beginning, I'm not sure. For as long as I can remember it has felt like the shift.  The start as opposed to the final act. 

I find myself having more energy for doing more things, I want to spend hours outside absorbing the beauty that surrounds me, cherishing the moments.  The pups seem to agree with me, as they are always up for an adventure.  And will gladly spend time frolicking anywhere we take them.  I keep finding new parks that we haven't explored yet, so they can have new scents and experiences. 

I also find myself wanting to work on my home, insuring that we have everything we need before the winter months approach.  That must be something in the DNA, maybe I am a bit of a pioneer girl at heart, I'm fairly positive that I will never fit into this crazy modern world of ours. And I'm finally comfortable with it.  I have finally reached the point that I have quit trying to fit in.  Love me or leave me, I am simply going to always be a very old fashioned woman. And I'm truly okay with it. 

In fact I'm thriving in it. I never wanted a career, I was always drawn to taking care of my family and home.  Unfortunately our modern world prevented it for a very long time.  I am often saddened that I missed so much time with my kids, that I role modeled the wrong values.  But... they are both successful people in ways that make them happy, so I can't have been too terrible of a role model.  Now I am happy being a stay at home dog mom, doing the things that make a home for my Hubs and I.  I am finally okay with it, I am finally in a good space.  

Well, the fire is starting to die down, the sky is starting to lighten and the promise of a new day is at hand.  Hubs should be wrapping up the work projects that he has spent the morning engrossed in and will soon be wanting breakfast.  Yep... time to start the day... 

love and prayers... 

oh my Belle...

What an incredibly short night.  I'm struggling this morning, my eyes are heavy and my motivation is completely lacking.  I was so tired all day yesterday and looking forward to curling up in bed as the sun started sinking into the horizon.  

I should have guessed the puppies were up to something, when the smell of dinner cooking didn't have them under my feet.  I'd looked outside and the motion lights were not on, so I mistakenly assumed they were upstairs in bed already.  They had already had their dinner, maybe they were just tired, and they are both semi-afraid of being outside in the dark although they are becoming braver. 

Just as I am putting away the dishes from dinner, I hear a bark.  Just one.  It's dark and I'm sure the neighbors aren't going to appreciate it, so I go outside to correct Belle, it was her bark. Instead of them barking at the fence I see them down by the shed in the dark and her very posture tells me she has something cornered.  That and the fact that my big strong marshmallow of a guy is cautiously bouncing back and forth trying to find his courage. 

I called them in... nope, wasn't happening.  Trying to see in the dark wasn't working and I really didn't want to take my eyes off them to go and get a flashlight and to manually trigger the motion lights.  I finally did anyhow, as my distracting them had gotten them to move away. 

nothing is slowing this girl down

Didn't see anything, finally coaxed them inside and shut the door.  No more outside time for them last night.  And they both desperately wanted back out.  It wasn't until Belle lifted her head from the water bowl that I realized I might have an issue.  There on her nose, spaced less than half an inch apart were two beads of blood.  Cleaning it up I realized it was far more clear than blood, but the little terror had found herself a snake. 

I have never in my life dealt with a snake bite, the only thing fairly comforting to me was the fact that I have never seen a venomous one near our home, at all.  Mostly your typical black, brown or garden varieties.  We have on occasion been terrified by a fairly large black rat snake, it's the one that climbed our siding to eat the baby bird over the light. So I could sort of take a breath. 

Until I asked Hubs what to do, honestly there are many times I assume that he has encountered everything and would have a ready answer.  I was not prepared for the "I have no idea what to do, better google it".  What?! That was not the answer I needed at that moment.  Especially as she immediately threw up her water and was standing there looking at me like what is going on?

trying to get the ball, hours before 
the snake incident

A quick call to the emergency vet calmed and terrified me all in one moment.  First she says she wouldn't worry, what to watch for and when to call them back.  That if it was going to be a problem I should know within 30 minutes to an hour.  Assuring me that dogs react differently to snake bites than humans do and then "if she has a reaction you will need to bring her in, you should have time they don't pass away immediately".... WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!

Keep her calm and watch her.  Again... what???  Of course it is the hyper puppy, not the laid back chill puppy.  I could barely keep her from playing, even after major abdominal surgery. But okay... 

see mom I've got my ball...
I'm fine.... geez

As the minutes ticked slowly by, my stress was heading downward, she was acting just like her normal self and the only visible sign was a slight bump on the side that had bled the most.  Her gums stayed their normal bright pink, she acted just like herself and best of all no swelling. 

I know, I probably didn't need to worry.  But I am that person, so worry I did.  My dear friend talked on the phone with me for a few more hours while I cautiously watched her, checking on her, disrupting her rest, trying to convince myself that what I knew in my heart was true, she would be just fine.  Ugghhh that is hard to do, heck, I still worry non-stop about my very grown children.  Even though I know they are out there living their best lives.

no fear...

can't stop moving...

After about 4 hours of that nonsense my body took complete control, told my brain to shut up and forced me to go to sleep.  Luckily she decided last night was a good night to need to sleep by mom's head, Dad had given up on all of my shenanigans and gone to sleep in the guest bedroom (don't blame him at all). Every movement brought my eyes open and my hand to rest against her chest, assuring myself that she was okay. 

Somewhere around 3 am I finally must have fallen asleep, only to be awakened around 3:30 am by a happy bouncing Belle bringing me her toy and letting me know it was time to wake up and love on her, our usual routine.  For a small dog she is powerful and jumping on mom is a favorite thing.  They both decided that mom could sleep a bit longer, but after a restless night even 7 am was not a refuge. 

She's fine.  She ate a big breakfast, Hubs let them do their usual front yard potty break in the wee hours of the morning (he's the reason they wake up at unholy hours of the night - he does too), she's played and been her usual self.  The only thing unusual was that I actually got her to lie down in my lap and accept loving for 10 whole minutes without jumping down a dozen times.  Couldn't get a picture of that miracle, was far too busy enjoying the wonder of it. 

Neither Belle nor Beau are willing to leave the deck this morning, looking longingly at the toys that they've dropped down the stairs.  I guess I will need to take them both down and encourage them to explore again.  

I'm thankful she is okay.  I'm concerned that a snake was dumb enough to hang out in my yard, my babies are always running around out there, maybe it was just passing through.  Hubs assures me that she will never try to catch another snake, I have my doubts.  She is the most bull headed puppy I've ever known.  She and Beau almost had a box turtle this weekend, he was willing to walk away much sooner than she was.  She's tried to catch several toads now, including a huge one on Saturday.  For being a super smart puppy, I think she allows her brain to go on vacation when she sees prey.  Moths, butterflies, bees, squirrels, toads, turtles and now snakes... oh my....

chasing butterflies...

It's gonna be a rough day.  I am so very weary.  So are they.  Thankfully... my little sweet girl is okay, I would be crushed to lose either of them young. I want them to live their full lives and only then will I be able to emotionally deal with their losses.  I know this about myself.... 

love and prayers...

gratitude and joy...

Good morning from the treetop garden!  I'm sitting here beside my fading little fire, enjoying this beautiful morning.  I can't believe it is late August and I needed a sweatshirt to sit here beside the fire to push back the chill.  How utterly amazing. The puppies decided we should get up early today, Daddy woke up at four so mommy shouldn't sleep past 4:15 am should she?  Those "little" pups are huge now so those tiny jumps will take the breath right out of you when you are deeply asleep.  

I tried for about fifteen minutes to ignore them, but they can be quiet insistent when they want attention, besides, by then my brain had fully engaged and there was no drifting back to dreamland.  Instead it was full of random thoughts... ya know the kind... what in the world are they fighting over, is that going to choke them, oh goodness am I getting pounced again, should I just get up and start the day, what all do I need to accomplish, I could be using this time productively... yeah that list and more barged in loudly and on auto-repeat. 

As I led them downstairs my eyes were still semi-closed, my feet felt leaden, I really was still sleepy and to top it off the coffee wasn't even brewed yet.  As soon as I walked out into the garden so that they could go outside I felt whole and fresh.  The slight cresent of the moon was barely visible through the trees, I would have expected it to be further west, but I am sure that is a sign of the changing seasons.  The sky was clear and filled with stars, the air was crisp and clean.  I cherish my time outside.  

Right now I am sitting here watching what appears to be an entire family of squirrels (one of which is pure white) racing through the canopy of the trees high above the garden.  They are running through the branches, assuredly jumping and flying gracefully through the air when the distance is a bit too far.  I love watching them, as long as they stay out of the garden.  So far I've seen 5 of them.  Every few moments there is a slight chattering sound from their direction, I don't have any nut trees out there, so unfortunately they are doing any preparing for the cold winter that will soon be upon us. 

Pretty sure I am his support human,
yes he is lying on my legs

The pups are 9 months old now and every day they loose a few more of their puppy fears.  This morning they happily romped for hours in the darkness, something unheard of even a few weeks ago. I've watched them timidly more further and further out from the light.  Today felt like the day they grew up.  As they wrestled, played, ran and romped over the course of the entire yard.  They just got baths on Saturday, today, they look like little mud puddle pups again. Belle will groom herself.  Beau, nope, he is pure boy, he will proudly sit there covered from head to tail and everything in between with a puzzled look on his face that you are concerned with his appearance.  All he needs is a backwards baseball cap to finish the look. They both just went inside to take their morning nap, Belle as tidy as you please and Beau moving through the house like my personal Pig Pen from Charlie Brown. 

why lie on the mat when you can lie in the dirt?

brave explorers in the early dawn

I'm not a huge fan of non-stop sweeping and vacuuming, but they are living their best lives and bringing me boundless joy and happiness.  What's a little dirt?

The seasons are definitely shifting, each day there are a few more brightly colored leaves lying on the deck, the bright reds are starting to pop up in the trees.  My garden is transitioning.  I've let a few things go to seed, in fact just this morning I picked a huge yellow pickle, I will harvest the seeds in a short while.  It was so prolific that I want to insure I have the same plant next year.  There is still active growth on most everything, tomato bushes are heavy with fruit, peppers and beans abound.  My okra is still putting out long slender pods. 

This morning while I was drinking my coffee and watching puppies I decided I may as well work in my garden, there was plenty of light and it was definitely cool enough.  There is something magical about working in the moonlight in your garden.  I watched the spiders spinning their webs, working frantically to get them finished before mornings light, planning for the feast they will have tonight when the sun sets. I braced the tomatoes to hold them tall, so many of the plants are still covered with beautiful tomatoes. 

I am going to harvest some of the green beans here in a bit, I'll can them up in the stews that I will make today.  As winter makes fresh, local veggies hard to find we will enjoy the flavors of summer. I read an article recently in regards to smoking and drying my peppers to preserve them, I need to dig a bit deeper and then I will reach out to my friends that smoke for me when all of these peppers are ready.  The Anaheim and Pinata peppers are covered.  I feel so blessed by the bounty I've been able to grow.  Even the jalapeno's that I was sure were done, are once again covered with new leaves, flowers and peppers.  

Hubs and I spent a very quiet weekend, mostly at home, resting, puttering and watching some movies he picked.  I made great progress on the sweater I am working on, I'm anxious to finish it, but realistic enough to know that I have probably got a couple more weeks to completion. I can't stop everything and knit, although it is tempting. 

added about 6 inches since I took the picture

When we went out yesterday, I realized why I am finding more and more peace being at home.  People are getting angrier and more aggressive. Every time I go out I am observing it. We went to a couple of farmers markets, they were looking fairly bare.  Although there was a steady stream of people, all hoping to find what was on their lists.  

My heart sunk at the last one we were at, it was fairly well stocked although the prices were higher than expected.  A very elderly couple next to me were sorting through peaches, carefully filling a box, in hushed tones they were talking about canning them.  Each questioning the other if they knew how to do it, both saying they didn't, but they were going to have to learn if they wanted to eat.  He in his overalls with time worn hands and creases on his face making me think he spent a great deal of time outside doing manual labor, burst into a huge smile and assured her that he had the internet, he could figure it out. 

I'm worried about where our world is heading.  I am trying not to fear for the future, but finding myself often pondering it.  I went to a regular grocery after exhausting all of the local markets, I had to give up.  I was stunned.  So many shelves were bare, meat departments were not only basically empty, but the costs for things has risen so much.  There was barely any dairy and I was stunned to see full sections of shelves and refrigerated sections completely empty.  I watched so many pick things up, look at the prices and put them back.  If Hubs hadn't been waiting in the car I feel that I would have lingered just to observe.  

I hope you are paying attention.  Things are not getting better regardless of what we hear on the news.  The story they are telling doesn't match up with what you see in the real world.  Trying to get gas was absolutely stressful.  We sat in line for about 20 minutes, people were aggressively cutting one another off, you could see the tension as the got out of their cars to pump gas.  Sure the price is down a bit, but it makes you question what is causing the anxiety if everything is as okay as they say. 

Well, the sun is breaking across the horizon, Hubs has already left for the day, he's taking my car in for a tire rotation before he begins his busy day.  It's inspection week, I won't see much of him. My fire is almost gone, my coffee is cold, I guess it's time to give up on the slow waking up and get busy with my day.  Much to do... 

I'm sending you all prayers for prosperity, joy and gratitude....

love and peace...