Saturday, June 29, 2013

Shut it off!! It's Saturday!!!!

It takes a special kind of stupid to forget on Friday night to shut off the alarm, and it makes for a giant Saturday morning failure. 

Yep, I would be describing me, I am the special one.  So there can be no complaining.  Usually I am awake before it goes off, so I don't think about it.  Today I was sound asleep and trying to figure out what was going on.  The only thing worse is to wake up with the feeling of not knowing what day it is and feeling rushed to get ready for work, when it's SATURDAY!  Today = FAIL!

Since I'm up... it's time for coffee and then some serious house and yard work.  I hate that I get so worn out during the week that keeping up with all of it turns into a huge nightmare.  In a few hours time I will have all of it done and by the time normal people are awake I will be able to start my weekend. So maybe it was actually fate that I forgot?

Not sure what we are going to do, although we did toy with the idea of going to pick some blackberries at Eckerts.  They are ready for picking and I would love to make some blackberry jam.  I just don't know if I have the energy.  I have been pushing into that old energy supply pretty heavy lately and I am starting to feel the effects. Besides that... we never have bread.  I hate American bread, always have, but since we've been back from Germany it's even harder for me to eat it and I just don't have time to bake good bread daily.  And jam without bread is well... useless!

I misunderstood my sister's text message and thought they were coming to town this weekend, and it's really next week and weekend. So I cleared the wrong weekend.  Therefore, two beautiful, unattached days stretch out before hubby and I.  And according to the news the weather is supposed to cool off, great news!  I am not a fan of summer - at all! What to do...

I have a feeling what we will do is simply kick back and just be... I will work on my quilt blocks and remind him that he needs to find the pictures he wants for his.  Maybe we will watch a movie.  I don't know if there is anything going on we want to be part of.  The Pride Fest is going on downtown, we will skip it, neither of us are fans of large crowds. We haven't had time to get hubby's bike into the shop, so a ride is out of the question.  Not sure if I want to participate in any outside activities anyway, the bugs are brutal this year and I am hating on the ticks.

I have given up on getting my garden in, between work and the rain here it is almost July and there is nothing planted, beds are in rough shape.  I feel like this year simply isn't going to happen, and I think I am okay with it.  I will miss the freshness, but like I said, I am really worn out, so...

I learned a long time ago, that sometimes I have to accept the fact that I simply don't have enough energy for all the things I love to do and that sometimes things have to be left behind for a bit.  It's all because of those stupid ticks anyhow, and I have had enough fear this week because of them.

It's been 16 years now and I am still terrified of those things.  Oh I will deal with them, but the terror in my heart because of them is hard to deal with.  This week I was so afraid.  I only found one that had actually connected to me so I wasn't too stressed, but when I started feeling yucky on Wednesday night, my heart sank. Waking up dizzy on Thursday scared me more... the fact that I was feeling so many of the horrible things I had felt when I got Lyme all those years ago almost had me in a panic.  Thursday night was a struggle, the exhaustion was almost over whelming. I hated the dizzy feeling. I was freezing.  I was hurting. Hubby kept trying to take me to the doctor (I loathe doctors), today it is better.  Maybe it was simply pure exhaustion, I have been keeping quite a pace lately, if it isn't better by Monday I will go see one of those "doctors"... stupid ticks...

What are you going to do with your weekend??