the art of unbusy...

Up early, refreshed and ready to start the day!

Actually I've already started.  Kitchen is cleaned and ready for me to start doing some of the practices in my cooking class.  I have to tell you, the part leading up to this was boring me to NO end... I guess I know more about cooking than I thought and it was drudgery.

I used my new linen kitchen towels that I made yesterday, I am in love!  There will definitely be more of those in my future!  Not only do they look so awesome, they work fantastic.  Hubs and I were both a bit skeptical. 

I love those little successes.

So... I've been pondering what unbusy really means to me.  I don't do well with just sitting and doing basically nothing.  It simply isn't in my DNA, Hubs can relax into a movie and sit still for hours.  Part of me envies him that.  The other part cannot figure out how he hasn't gone batty.

For me, unbusy looks a lot more like having time that isn't structured or full of external demands.  A chance to simply do the things that fill my mental and emotional bucket.  I am a very creative person.  I feel the most fulfilled when I have the chance to be "doing".  Even watching a movie involves my hands moving - one of the primary reasons I don't like going to movie theaters.  It requires me to sit, just sit.  Ugghhh... can anyone say torture chamber?

I don't even sit well in a training or meeting.  I get distracted and my mind starts to wander, I mean seriously wander.  I start looking for that escape in my mind that my body cannot achieve in that moment.  But let me have even a pen and piece of paper to keep my hands mindlessly moving and my brain can completely engage again.

Yesterday was a very unbusy day for me.  I felt refreshed and rested.  Yet reflecting back, I accomplished so many things. The difference was that they were things that made me feel whole.  Things that filled me and enriched me.  Things that allowed me to grow and learn in areas that are important to me.

It wasn't spreadsheets, reports, forms, etc.  I don't mind those things, they are a part of my job.  I love my job most days.  But it doesn't meet all the needs that I have as a person.  And it shouldn't. And of course I dream about the day when I can retire and return to being a homemaker. 

There are many things that I miss about life.  I have a busy and consuming career, some things have been put on the shelf.  I will dust them off some day and resume where I left off.  But for now, when I can find those moments to look at them, touch them, renew my acquaintance with them - well I treasure those moments.

As I was sitting at my sewing machine yesterday, I was completely engrossed in what I was working on, but there were moments my mind started to wander to the half finished projects on the shelves (those darn shelves again) that were calling out.  Reminding me that they were there.  The pile of quilt tops on the dresser were literally shouting for me to take one down and load it on the long arm.  Pleading to be completed.  I could hear my heart softly whispering to them that their time was coming. 

And it is.

I am fairly positive that I will be putting one on the frame before the winter comes.  I'm longing to stand there work the designs in that will take it from being a quilt top, to being a finished useful quilt. It needs a bit more "unbusy" time than I have right now.  But winter and it's stillness are coming. 

I was even daydreaming about bringing one of my quilting frames upstairs, putting one of the old quilt tops that I inherited on it and starting to hand quilt it.  That is probably going to happen sooner than later also. 

I just have a few more projects that are dear to my heart that have more of a timeline to complete first.  I want all of the soaps done before the middle of November.  They all need cure time, not every soap I make is a melt and pour - one and done kind of thing.  In fact most of them are not. Hubs is often giving them away for Christmas gifts.  I sometimes sell a few of them, but mostly, I simply love the smell they give our home.

I have to work today, we are working on giving our fitness center a face lift, it's a very intense project that is requiring a bit of time and attention.  Before I go though, I feel like I will engage in a bit more "unbusy". 

I have several batches of soap that I want to complete, I want to do my practices, and of course I feel like there should be a few more inches put onto the wrap I am making for myself.

Over the course of this year, I have been working on doing more things that fill my bucket.  Things that improve my health be it physical or mental.  Hubs has been along for the ride.  I have to say I believe the key thing in my world is his undying love and support.  His understanding of who I am as a person. 

Yesterday he made a comment that had me smiling for hours.  He had taken a nap while I was sewing.  Before heading downstairs to relax with a movie, he leaned over my shoulder with a soft kiss and said "all is right with the world".  I asked what he meant and he explained that I was creating, I was in my happy place.  And that it made him happy too.

His eagerness to be my test buddy when I make new soaps, recipes, etc, is powerful stuff.  Unless it involves avocado (and he's getting better about that - although his favorite way to have avocado is in the soap he loves) it rarely requires any coaxing.

I guess in my long, roundabout way, and thinking through it all.  For me, unbusy isn't stopping.  It's moving on to the things that keep me fulfilled as a person.  I have to grow, learn, create.  For me it is as essential as sleeping and eating.  I don't do well with the status quo. 

Well the big boy is waiting for his long morning walk and Hubs has gone back upstairs to sleep a bit longer. So I guess Neeko and mom are going to go and enjoy this beautiful morning.  At least it isn't raining... then it is back to being unbusy!