I definitely admit to having a small obsession. But that isn't the meaning of this blog. I was scrolling through Facebook this morning. Looking for the uplifting and fun posts that I knew would be there. I came across a post from a friend referring to gas prices and making the comment that "we had the power all along".
It resonated with me.
We have had the power all along. We just haven't had the will and desire.
I wrote a post yesterday. It was light and full of energy. I hadn't gotten it finished before walking Neeko, so I decided to take some pictures of the beautiful morning to put in. It was a glorious morning. Beautiful. Sun shining, tree's budding, a brilliant blue sky. It made my morning perfect.
And then, just as quickly the rain rolled in. Physically and metaphorically. The clouds darkened before I could even get on my first conference call. By the time I logged in there was the roll of thunder and huge splashes of rain blurring the beauty. Making it hazy and hard to see. And as I started opening email my bright optimistic mood started to dim.
My energy card was strategy yesterday, it was telling me to plan. I was struggling to understand the path it was asking me to see.
Later in the day, as the sky was brightening once again. With the temperatures rising and the sound of people out walking and moving about, things that normally lift my heart. I had sunk to a low that felt impossible to climb out of.
My light and loving post, had never been posted. I simply couldn't find it in me to even edit it. My mood was black, my energy stolen and I was feeling defeated.
Words and actions are powerful. Anyone that knows me, knows that I come from a place of honesty and pure truth. I will not ever be deceitful, heck I don't even get invited to participate in pranks - I suck at it. So when I am surrounded by cloak and dagger, half truths and evasion. I also don't do well with stuck in a hole, closed mindsets. I struggle HARD!
None of us knows what the path ahead looks like. I am doing my level best to uplift and shine loving light on everyone. I struggle when people that I love and trust cannot return that same energy.
I was afraid that I would not sleep again last night. I was empty. I needed the rest, I knew it. But I also knew where my heart was, and worse yet, where my head was.
I decided to visit a couple of pages on Facebook that I knew would fill me with hope if there was any to be had. And sure enough, one of them had a message that I felt was spoken directly to me. I allowed myself to read it a few times, to focus on the words.
Climbing the stairs I was still lost in thought about it. I normally do not meditate at night, usually it is my morning routine. After the search through my crafting room had not netting me any more of the soft pale alpaca wool to spin, and listening to several podcasts. I decided I may as well try.
I'd only put in guided meditation - because frankly I was too frazzled to lead myself - and there it was. It had only been posted that morning. "Guided Meditation Before Sleep. Let Go of Fear in Uncertain Times". It was from the same channel that some of my favorite sleep music comes from so... yep, gave it a try.
It was the best meditation that I have had since the beginning of February at The Peace Place. Thirty minutes flew by and took my stress with it. I felt so peaceful and calm inside. So loved by all that is.
Each of us has our own way of dealing with things. This is mine.
As the world is slowing and changing some folks are reacting in negativity and anger. Some of reacting with fear. The universe is truly calling on us to lean into the changes. So many red flags have been up for a long, long time. I was talking with Hubs this morning, sharing with him my beliefs (which FYI collide hard with his good Catholic upbringing) that we have been individually asking the universe for things without realizing it.
I have asked for more time. Feeling rushed and frazzled. Mourning the loss of precious disconnectedness in a world that is far too connected and demanding. I was still going about my life. Just like everyone else. I was still running hither and yon.
And now.
My phone is silent in the morning, work isn't begging for my attention. I don't feel guilty taking the time to meditate, do energy exercises, walk my dog, or blog. At 5 pm, I am shutting off my computer. My phone only rings with loved ones, dear friends. I am treasuring the silence. The peace.
I know people are mourning some of their favorite activities. The physical connection. This is for but a moment in time. I saw that someone connected yesterday with a Bible verse. The numbers lined up the same. Telling us to isolate. Until it passed.
Soon enough we will join each other face to face. Soon enough we will laugh, play and celebrate.
Patience. A new day will dawn.
.
No comments:
Post a Comment