I'm still upset. I'm still questioning the stupidity that seems to be overwhelming our neighborhoods, towns, cities, states and our country at large. I feel an overwhelming need to hide. I know I can't. But I am sure that there is somewhere in this big, vast nation that stupidity is not the common denominator.
As I was struggling with the news about Ms. Norma, the closed group on Facebook that is our subdivision started blowing up. Cars and garages were being ransacked and stolen from. A few people had consequential losses. A few lost a few dollars in change. Others simply suffered from general disarray.
Next I start getting emails from our local "Nextdoor" app, seems all the surrounding neighborhoods are getting hit also.
For a moment or two, I savored the fact that Hubs is obsessive about light and locks.
He keeps our home lit up at night. It helps that we are by the main street light, but he also has super bright LED at multiple points out front. I often tease him about the brightness. I prefer semi-darkness. My eyes are not overly fond of brightness.
I'm sure that prevented them coming near our home. On the flip side, he is equally as obsessive about insuring that both of our cars fit in the garage, no matter how tight of a fit, that is where he wants them at night.
Why is that something we should be worried about?
"Nextdoor" for the community near my work is riddled with robberies, gun shots, car's being stolen and damaged.
This is all local.
All within miles of my front door.
And I am struggling with it. Was it always this bad? Was I too wrapped up in my own world?
I mean, I know kids will be kids. They will test their boundaries. That is part of the growth process.
It appears to me that our society as a whole has some serious issues. Have parents given up on the golden rule? Is life far too easy now? Do we not care anymore?
I am terrified that the last one is the root of it. It seems that we have a bunch of self-centered, spoiled brats running around.
It seems that we've become a "me" culture. Even parents are not putting their children first anymore and kids seem to be emulating it.
I don't know if any of you watched that video clip that I shared last time. It's probably the most powerful video that I have seen to address our society today.
The fact that sweet Ms. Norma is still working is a testament to her love of her family and her strong need to take care of them. She'd barely come out of surgery yesterday when one of the B's checked on her for me as I was still in meetings. She wasn't concerned about herself. She wasn't worried about the fact that at 81 she'd had to have surgery to remove a BB pellet that was lodged in her jaw bone, because of some selfish little brat.
Ms. Norma was worried about the fact that the holidays are fast sneaking up on us and here she was out of work for a bit to heal. She was losing money that she needed to care for her loved ones.
I assure you that Hubs and I will do without anything for our children or grand children, and I watch my daughter do the same. It's how we were raised, I've watched my parents do the same. It's simply what you do.
Or is it.
I personally know parents that do not check on their children, that leave them to their own devices. So many times we go to dinner and look around at children being completely ignored while mom and dad stare at their phones. They don't talk to their children, ask them about their day, they ignore the fact that they are acting up (or are they simply trying to be seen?).
On national news, heck international for that matter, its a long string of allegations of sexual assault of some kind or another. Often against powerful people, or rather people perceived to have power. I have to stop and wonder about it all. How did it get missed when they were young children or worse was it seen and ignored? How horrible to have that happen and feel powerless to call for help.
I'm afraid the devil is winning. And I don't believe in the devil.
I believe in free will. But without a consequence to actions what good is that? I do believe that each of us has the ability to make some really horrible choices. What are we deleting in our own makeup that is eliminating the ability to feel guilt.
Are we spending too much time worrying about people always feeling good, without spending equal time or doing and being good?
Can it be fixed?
Today is Veteran's Day.
I come from a long line of Vet's. By birth, family, marriage, life in general. I don't know how many generations back felt called to serve. I guess I could find out, I have aunts that have records going back generations. What I do know is that as far back as those that have lived during my lifetime, I have been surrounded by veterans. People for whom the call to service was powerful. People with the willingness to sign that blank check up to and including their own lives for our freedoms. My list of friends that has served makes me so proud to be able to call them all friends. They unselfishly have given parts of their lives for others. It wasn't a paycheck.
I wonder if it would make a difference to some of these wayward people to be part of something bigger than themselves. Last I heard in Germany you serve 18 months active duty or work for an organization like the Red Cross, after graduation.
I struggle with mandates for peoples lives, to me that feels too much like an abdication of free will. I wonder though. Might it help?
Does community service need to become something we are doing from grade school on? Back when I was a kid you were part of the scouts. Do we still have vibrant scout troops? Are we still teaching right from wrong? The only time I see scouts now is when they are selling over priced cookies, popcorn or Christmas trees.
Last I read both the boys and girls scouts were tackling bigger challenges than how to build the perfect fire and sewing on buttons. Maybe we need to step it back. Maybe we need to simply stop for a moment and go back to letting kids be kids.
Stop dragging them into our insanity. I hear so many conversations that include children that frankly shouldn't be part of their lives.
What I don't hear is laughter on the playground. Children running around chasing fireflies. Playing chase, hide and seek, pretending.
It's been forever since a young person has knocked on my door wanting to mow the lawn, rake the leaves, wash my car or shovel the snow. Working hard to raise the money for a treasure they either wanted for themselves or a loved one.
I remember begging my Dad to let me take on the job of "lawn boy" back in Germany. I wanted to have my own spending money. It was hard work, but it sure felt good on payday. Kids don't do that anymore. I would much rather pay a preteen or teen the $30 a week that I am paying a professional company for yard work. I would love to be part of developing their work ethic.
It's been so long since I have been part of a community clean up day. I know that I am a military brat and "base clean up" was simply part of every day life. Here is my question, why isn't it part of every day life everywhere? Days were organized, tools were gathered, extra trash hauling and composting ordered. And for four or five hours we all worked together. Everyone. The officers and their families were no more important than the enlisted and theirs. In the fall we picked up trash, we raked leaves, painted benches, things were fixed, trash cans emptied, brooms were pushed and sidewalks edged. Our community came together to make it a better place to live.
Our community gathered, served and then fellowshipped when it was done. The moms with small children divided the tasks of watching the little's and fixing snacks and hot chocolate to be enjoyed when we were done.
When did those things disappear?
Again, I ask... when did we stop caring?
Today Hubs and I will run a few errands and do a few chores. On my list, buying food to donate to the food drive all of our Y's are participating in. Knowing that some of those families and individuals that will be fed are Veterans. I will clean out closets, looking for gently loved coats to donate to the Winter Warm Up that we are also hosting at the Y. Because I know there are far too many in our community that risk being cold this winter. I have hats and will buy a few pairs of gloves to donate also. No one should be cold. I will be buying a gift card to donate to Ms. Norma, so that she and her family will be able to have a nice holiday despite these current challenges.
Later today Hubs will go out and mulch all the leaves in our yard. He will take care of the leaves for our neighbor also. He will do it, because helping others is in his DNA.
I firmly believe that helping others is in all of our DNA, it's part of the core of who we are as humans. I am simply afraid that we've forgotten how. That we are all so busy being wrapped up in us, that we've forgotten to be generous with our hearts and hands.
I can't change the world. Not even willing to try. I don't think any of us really need to. We are all getting caught up in politics and things that divide us. We are allowing external forces, money, and pride to get in the way of doing good. Of teaching our children to do good, of modeling those behaviors.
Can you imagine a world where we didn't allow that? A world where we didn't care who you voted for, what high school you went to (yep, I finally figured that one out), what street you live on, if you have a nice car or ride the bus, what your skin tone is, who your partner in life is, what prayers you said or didn't say, and there are a million other dividers.
Can you imagine a world where "we the people" saw a need and filled it? I'm not a big fan of government. They've been destroying us for a long, long time. But I am a strong proponent of the power of love. Of communities coming together to help each other. Maybe if we could master that on the smallest level, within our families, sub-divisions, streets, etc... soon that movement would be expanding exponentially. Maybe then a Ms. Norma wouldn't be afraid to go pick up her chili supplies at night. Because the lights would be bright, the parking lot clear, and people wouldn't be afraid to say the names of people that have harmed them. Because united the criminal would be afraid of the victim, not the other way around.
Well... I guess I am babbling. I am trying to sort out too much in my head. And if you've read this, you are probably feeling as crazy as I feel right now.
Maybe we just need to flip the switch. Start an avalanche of good. Anyone want to join me?
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