where is fall???

So... would bringing out the boots be sort of like washing your car?  Do you think it would bring back the beautiful cool fall days?  Just like washing your car brings on rain?

The Polly Anna in me has decided that is the case.  For the first time since late spring, I am wearing my ankle boots.  I'm hoping Mother Nature gets the hint.  Because this girl is desperate for fall to finally appear!  I am tired of being hot and uncomfortable!  I can't truly stand the heat.  I seriously without a moments hesitation would move north.  Somewhere with mild temps all summer would be perfect. Because I also happen to love the cold.

As Hubs and I strolled our favorite fall event, The Strange Folk Festival on Saturday, the sweat rolling down our backs and faces made it less than wonderful. It was beautiful, in fact looking at the pictures I took no one would believe that it was actually in excess of 96 out there. It really hindered our enjoyment of the event and our shopping experience.  Although it didn't stop me from buying yarn, even though I haven't picked up my needles in about a year... shhhh...

I'm taking a me minute this morning before dashing off to work.  A short minute to balance my brain and my life.  I am desperately trying to figure out how to bring it all back to center.

I didn't take my morning walk, decided I wanted that extra hour of sleep. But I did prep dinner for Hubs - I have to work late, but he will have a nice pot roast with potatoes and brussels waiting for him when he gets home for his busy day at work.  And I did pack my lunch and chop up some fresh veggies for snacks and cooking.  And it's only 8:30 am.  So I am feeling rather accomplished.

Had some quality time with Hubs and breakfast together at the table, too.  Although I am not so sure that the LONG leisurely walk with the boys counts as any form of exercise, after all as the human's on the other end of the leash... well, honestly we barely move.

I know it's shocking lately isn't it? Time with the Hubs and the boys.  I feel a happy dance coming on!

I'm sitting here looking around my home.  The mail is still scattered slightly on the island, a couple of new magazines to add to the pile of ones I haven't made time to read yet, and a Craftsy catalog open to a pattern that has caught my attention.  My flowers are bright and perky in the middle of the island, and lunch boxes are sitting there ready for another day. The "house elf" did the dishes that I was too tired to do last night after fixing dinner.  And all I hear are the subtle snores of the boys and the ticking of the clock.

We lost the turtle last week.  His fountain was a constant sound for almost 15 years.  It broke my heart a bit.  I know he was simply a turtle, but when you've cared for something for 15 years, well... it becomes a part of your life.

Each time we lose one of our babies, the silence feels overwhelming.  You realize how much they leave a mark on your life.  My boys are slowing down a lot lately.  The big guy's eyes are starting to get hazy and his boundless energy only comes in spurts now.  I am already missing the pounding of his big puppy feet running endlessly up and down the stairs.  I'm noticing that he waits patiently to see if we truly do intend to go and or stay wherever we have wandered.  The big lug that used to plow you down when you come home now ambles slowly up to you wagging that big ole tail to let you know he is still just as excited to see you.

My little guy continues to amaze me.  I was told I would lose him almost two years ago now.  Yet he still sleeps curled up next to me.  He doesn't bounce up and down the stairs anymore either, and we often have to supervise his trips on them as he's lost his footing a few times.  Those short legs don't have the bounce they used to possess. He sits when he eats his treats now, his bouncy personality replaced of a gentle calmness.

And then there is the cat... She's my son's, but he can't have her.  And honestly she's lived with me since she was a wee baby, taking her away now would probably upset her. She misses her boy, whenever he comes home she stays by his side non-stop, the rest of the time, she is always near me. At 15 she still acts like a kitten most days.

Time keeps moving on.

I think that is what is driving me to balance my life out.  Tomorrow isn't promised to any of us.  I was only semi-joking with my kids when I sent them text messages that said "if the world ends today, remember I love you", in response to the prediction that Nibiru would end the world on September 23rd.

I'm not really worried about a mysterious planet ending the world, nor am I a big proponent of any of those end of days predictions.  But sadly, life is finite for each of us.  And I firmly believe in what we do with our "dash".  At the end of it, I don't want my family and loved ones to feel that all I did was work.  I want them to all know that I loved them first and foremost.  I want them to sit around and remember the meals I cooked for them, the laughter, the love, the always being there.  I want them to always know that they were the important piece. They were the reason I worked, to help provide.

Tomorrow really isn't promised.  And lately well between natural and man made disasters and struggles, it's looking a lot like someone or something is trying to make us pay attention to what is important.

So I feel like... loving my loved ones a bit more, fixing those dinners so that we have time together, spending time doing things that make me feel fulfilled, and loving on those fur babies just a bit more.  I think I can keep myself busy while I wait for fall... but it sure better hurry!  I am definitely TIRED of being hot...