Sunday, June 10, 2018

embracing slow...

Hubs and I are lounging out on the deck.  The sun hasn't invaded yet, but the pristine blue sky is shimmering overhead.  There is a beautiful breeze and he's playing soft music while enjoying his cigar.  Me?  I'm lost in a million different thoughts, ideas and plans.  Perfectly content to sit out here in our "tree house".  If I was alone I wouldn't be playing music, but I know it soothes him.  I'm focusing on the rustling of the leaves, the birds chirping and all the myriad sounds of nature.

I wasn't ready to cook, I wanted to enjoy some of the early morning beauty.  So I fixed us each a bowl of sweet watermelon to have with our morning coffee.

I haven't checked Facebook all morning, it's been too perfect of a day for me to need the daily uplifting of all the positive sites I follow.  It's been peaceful.  Centered.  Yet when I checked it I was greeted with a memory.  From a time when I made time for important things.

"the peaceful quiet before the family wakes up, the joy of seeing the changes in the garden you have planted, the smell of fresh brewed coffee... and the knowledge that the day is stretching out in front of you with no commitments or need to do more than float in the pool... its a good morning!"

I wrote that 7 years ago today.  Long before I spent time blogging or working an insane amount of hours.  Back when I still remembered how to relax.  The irony... We don't have a pool anymore, the kids are grown and living their own lives. But I have my fresh coffee, I was snapping pictures of the plants in my pretend garden and yet again I am simply enjoying this beautiful morning.

Yellow Potatoes
Wave Petunia

Hubs is wanting to go ride, I guess we will, although for a bit yet I just want to sit.  I want to savor the scents, the sounds, the peace.  My soul has needed this weekend.

I had a to do list a mile long yesterday.  I did a few chores while enjoying the hours of rain, coming down in sheets at times.  I don't know that I tackled much of the list and I don't care.

I spent hours sitting still in the silence, listening to the rain beating down.  Washing the world clean, making it fresh and green. It encouraged my "volunteer" flowers and those silly potatoes to grow even more.  Ironically all the plants that were supposed to come back didn't.  Yet one single wave petunia has decided it wanted to come back this year.


I researched soaps, making a list of ones that I want to try.  I need to find some folks willing to use all this soap soon, or I will need to stop making it... so many bars of soap!  My laundry room smells heavenly, if a touch over whelming.  There are bars of dandelion, lily of the valley, charcoal and tea tree, lavender and clean cotton, rose clay and pink salt bars, a batch of that fabulous triple butter and of course Hubs'  much requested shaving soap bars - those smell unbelievable! Who would have ever thought tobacco and bay would become my all time favorite scent?

Tobacco and Bay Shaving bars

Lavender/Clean Cotton and Triple Butter bars

Dandelion and Lavender/Clean Cotton bars

Charcoal/Tea Tree and more lavender and clean cotton

Lily of the Valley

Rose Clay and Pink Sea Salt bars, bath bombs and the flowers in memory of Dad

On my planning board... a coffee soap, avocado soap, coconut milk, blueberry/thyme and a calendula sunshine mix. Having written that out I am not laughing in my head.  Sounds like I am planning a breakfast buffet almost.  Each of them has so many more uses than eating.  Different oil blends that soften the skin and calm the soul.   I placed an order for supplies last night.  The only one that is a hot process is the blueberry/thyme.  The rest of them will be increasing my patience skills.  I always avoided cold process because I struggle with having patience.

We watched some shows and ran a few errands.  Mostly we just relaxed.  Hubs needs the break, his back is hurting him so much, only a few more days until he gets the first shot that will promise him relief.

Today promises to be much like yesterday.  I've spent my morning learning about different oils and their impact on the body, the senses and their healing powers.  I am fairly sure I might make some bath bombs, I'm down to two that I made and one can never have too many bath bombs. I might tackle a few more items on that list, as the weather is promising to be far too hot for my tastes.


Although... I really feel like it's going to be a day spent simply being.  In this journey to center I am finding that I have forgotten too many things about simply enjoying the act of existing. I'm learning to be unbusy.  It's a foreign concept for me.  I noticed a couple of times yesterday that I was feeling lost.  Like I didn't know how to exist without a to do list. I started to find busy work, things to fill my space.  After a few moments of being uncomfortable with unstructured time, I savored it.  I spent some time talking on the phone with my daughter while watching a squirrel busy doing something at the top of one of the trees out back.  I fiddled with my camera (that has been sitting on the shelf for far too long) and took some photos. I read and I centered.

I'm considering starting to take some yoga classes, and my favorite yoga instructor is always talking about meditation and the value of it, I am feeling drawn to it.  I may have to try.

I am loving this journey.  I am cherishing the beauty and simplicity I am chasing.  I have reached a point in my life that I need it.

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