I don't think it's ever been that long since I've dumped my thoughts and ideas. Since I've shared or rambled. I've been busy. Busy living, busy learning, exploring things that have popped up and enjoying my family and close friends. Mostly, I have been very introverted as I have walked along this path of discovery.
Since I've been quiet I've discovered that I really enjoy participating in small craft fairs, something that will never make me wealthy, but will keep my hands and heart busy. I've been creating and learning new skills. Seems I move through seasons with crafting the same way that I move through seasons with everything else.
Since August I have found myself fully engrossed in a lot of "slow" work. Embroidery, crocheting, and applique have been the primary projects. I have been working on finally wrapping up a few dozen projects, nope... not wrapping up, but moving them towards completion.
There have been hours spent learning to use my new longarm and we are becoming best friends and I adore the time spent quilting.
Somewhere along the way, I became engrossed in working on our family trees and was finally able to make a very treasured connection for my sweet Hubs. Now I am a touch obsessed and find myself wanting to visit graveyards far more frequently than is probably normal.
I put my garden to bed sometime in November and here it is time to start planting the cool weather seeds before the heat of summer sneaks in. The red buds have already bloomed and I need to take some time to go an gather blossoms this week. So many folks love the red bud jelly that I need to make sure I have an ample stash. Where does time seem to dash off to?
Hubs and I were chatting about time moving quickly, reminiscing about my 50th birthday party and how proud he was to bring so many of my dearest friends and family together for it. I stumbled for a moment to remember how old I will be this year. Hardly seems like it, but I will be 59 this year. Not even remotely sure how that happened. Wasn't I just in my 30's? Hmmmm.... guess not.
I've been engrossed in my journey with the Lord. Everyday I learn more, I travel down a road that I have walked passed many times in my life, never managing to glance much less explore. Each road brings me greater clarity and appreciation. It also brings me some regret. So much I wish I had learned so long ago. I often wonder what choices I would have made differently in my life, what paths would I have turned away from. Many choices would have been different. The beauty is that grace and redemption are there. God never expected us to be perfect, he figured out real quick that we never would be. But like any loving parent, he provided us the guidance to always come home.
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| We spent the day chasing his roots, seems the town is now under the lake. |
Hubs and I are on the journey together and each step feels stronger than the one before. I truly am blessed. All of this has been such a gift, it has taken away the angst and anxiety daily life was bringing. It has given me the ability to live in a strange peacefulness that I have always felt was missing.
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| throw the flying disk dad... |
After we take the pups to the park (krap when speaking of it in their presence), we will fix dinner and tidy up for another night. I will curl up with my Bible, a cup of hot chocolate and read the book of Esther, it is Purim and we are all here for such a time as this. I love the story and I am looking forward to the peace before I head up to bed.
I'm still wrapped up in a million things, with another million more swimming around in my brain that I am longing to share and have conversations about. I don't know what the future holds for my sweet little blog. Some days I feel overwhelmingly drawn to write, and then my daily tasks step into place and the day is gone and so is the urge to write.
I'm not really sure what drew me to write today. I've started probably five or six blog posts that ended up in the delete draft pile. Something made me long to reconnect. I finished up the six batches of soap that I made this morning and early afternoon and brought my computer back down to my desk. My old Chromebook that I have written most of these entries on has finally breathed it's last, I do believe. So I borrowed my own laptop for the lye calculators I needed. I might steal Hubs' Chromebook, he rarely ever uses it, who knows. Plugging it back in my heart was pulled here.
There has been so much going on in the world. I have had many family and friends suffering from what seems like continual tragedy and chaos. I think that is what caused me to step back, I want to help everyone and I know that I simply can't. Then I get stuck in this bubble of not being able to do anything because I feel helpless. It's a vicious circle.
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| Just checking in |
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| Me too! |
I feel that is why I had to step away from so much. I needed to find my center. I feel like I've found it, I feel ready to be part of the world again.
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| never mind, it's nap time |
Hopefully, I will be back. Not sure how frequently, but hopefully it won't be six months.
much love and many prayers... b
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