Looking at the evil...

It sure feels cold this morning.  I have a long list of to do's, but I need to write.  I put it off all day yesterday, even though I knew I needed to write.  I found a million little things to do.  Oddly, more and more of the stuff that was eating at my brain and heart found a way to make itself known over the course of the day. Even while doing something as mindless as playing solitaire on my phone. 

I need to write about an observation I've been having.  A feeling that is getting stronger and stronger by the moment. A lot of the reason that I quit writing daily in the first place.  For the longest time I've felt this feeling, this sense of good versus evil, right versus wrong, I am not sure either of those descriptions are entirely accurate, but they are also not inaccurate.  I am not sure there are words available that fit the thoughts completely.  

Yesterday, while trying to move myself out of the bubble I was in, the longing to write, the inability to string together the thoughts, I found myself listening to every random podcast that interested me in the slightest.  I did this while I was working on a few canning projects cranberry juice and a lovely orange rhubarb jam, nothing major, simply distractions. I needed the distractions.  

One of them I was listening to felt like a whack upside the head, a jarring to my own memories and thoughts.  The person was speaking of a dream they'd had and the huge impact that dream had on them.  I understood what he was saying, although that wasn't what jarred me.  He was speaking of how God speaks to all of us in different ways and it depends on whether or not we are listening as to the impact of the words.  

It reminded me abruptly of a drive to work a few years ago.  I think I might have even written about it in the past.  Hubs was heading south that day and was going to take the motorcycle.  I did not want him to for whatever reason, I was convinced it was a terrible idea and wouldn't end well.  As I was driving to work I was filled with panic and ended up having a full blown panic attack, I turned around and came home, made him stay with me until I was calm.  Oddly, I remember the calming started as soon as I made the turn to come home, I was still a wreck when I got home, but I could breath and had stopped shaking. 

He rode his bike that day, I ultimately calmed and went to work.  I don't know which one of us was protected from something horrible happening that day, but we both ultimately went about our days and came home to one another safely at the end of the day. 

I've had many moments like that in my life, times when I felt anxiety and stress come into my world, often seemingly without reason or cause. My daughter's car accident, when our other daughter came into our lives are just two of them that jump into my thoughts.

Lately, I have felt very strongly drawn to prayer, to listening to different pastors sharing God's messages and leading me lots of research and questioning things.  And also to a strong sense of peace. 

We are living in a very evil time.  I think most folks are absolutely blind to it, they have slowly become jaded and cold where things are concerned. Even our churches are blinding us, leading us to look away.  We have been controlled for so very long that we are missing what is right before our very eyes. 

If you haven't heard about all of the vileness surrounded a certain fashion house, it might be time to do some homework.  Instead of ignoring the millions of invaders at our southern border, maybe stop and question some of it.  The information is out there, if you want to see it.  If you want to understand. 

I've always loathed the grand gala's at the beginning of sporting events and the like, half-time shows have always seemed off to me.  Looking at them now, I feel an even greater sense of discomfort and dislike. They have always seemed distasteful and almost dark.  Never quite making sense in the context of the event they were associated with.  

I'm not a fan of anything high fashion and have never felt the need or draw to wear a companies name on myself or my belongings, if I like the quality and style, I wore it.  But just to have it, regardless of the cost, nope never going to happen. I don't need your so called status symbols. Heck, I usually remove the dealers signs from my vehicles, I am not paying to advertise for you.

Slowly it dawned on me in the past few days that even the ads in my so called mindless games are designed to elicit dark feelings.  I mean seriously... sexualized anime for a game?  Nonstop ads for sexualized e-books, most often dealing with werewolf's and the like... seriously? 

If they aren't about sex, then they are dealing with children, animals and women being tossed aside in harsh conditions and asking you to save them in a game.  What kind of emotions and feelings are they working to pull out of you, to draw you into a game?  And you don't have the option of playing the game with the ads popping up.  What are they trying to do?  

Hubs and I have both noticed that while watching a few of the old shows we enjoy that the commercials have evolved to just a few topics... pharmaceuticals, fast food or weight loss or don't forget medicare and "money, money, money" (I loathe that one).... odd those things seem to be all there is.  

Listening to the pharmaceutical commercials is enough to send a sane person off the chain... Have you ever really listened?  Hmmm... eczema or death... seems like a no brainer to me. Those side effects seem worse than the original problem.  But I know many people that take medication on top of medication.  Heck Hubs used to, now he takes nothing and is doing so much better than when they were medicating him for what they diagnosed. 

Has anyone seen Died Suddenly?  I'll admit I haven't.  I can't.  I have too many loved ones that I feel it would shatter me.  

Again... evil... 

The more I learn, the more I dig deeper into the stuff not covered in the official narrative (main stream media), the more I feel the depth of evil that we have become enslaved to.  

There is so much going on right now.  Interest rates increasing, inflation, sorry I think we are heading for a depression, we've already blew through the recession.  Don't forget all of the evil with taxes, but definitely ignore the evil with FTX and why the guy that is responsible is still not arrested and all that baloney.  Let's go after the drones (meaning us) but not the rich and powerful.

Don't forget all the clean energy, another total crock of you know what... and I used to be a huge proponent of it, until you start digging past the hype and glamour.  I'm thankful I never bought an EV or put solar on my home.  All those folks that have bought into it... might want to stop and take a deeper look.  Heck even the vehicles and such cannot be made without petroleum.  

What is happening to our children in the schools is beyond unimaginable.  And yet, we choose to believe what we are told.  Instead of opening our eyes and truly listening and hearing what is blatantly out there for all of us to see.  

For God's sake, think. 

The evil being created and used to control us is unreal, we are not part of a earthly battle, we are the pawns in a supernatural one.  I know that God wins, I know that he has already won, but this journey is going to be a touch rocky.  

There are many that do not know this, that are going along to get along.  I'm thankful that I am waking up, refusing to go along to get along.  At some point in this game the chips will be called in.  At some point everything will be painfully obvious to everyone, will it be too late?

This is definitely a battle of biblical proportions, it is definitely the darkest before dawn... I'm no longer hearing a still small voice, I am hearing a loud booming roar... 

But God!