building communities...

I did not get a flame thrower out this morning, but it took immense restraint.  Wasn't even awake for 30 minutes when I took my coffee down stairs to let the Pups play in the yard. Turned to sit in the chair down there and this large fella was hanging out.  Needless to say, I didn't sit, and the picture is a tad fuzzy because I took it with serious zoom.  I have never seen a spider that big in my yard.  Or since I've moved to this area of the country.  It was at least 2 inches, if not bigger.  Again, that was as close as I was getting. Went down a bit ago only to discover it has left.  Now the question remains to where? I will admit it is giving me a bit of anxiety.  Are there more of them?  Does it have a nest in my siding?  What kind is it?  Yes, those are the thoughts that bombarded me, as I took my coffee and decided sitting inside this morning was preferable. 

I love my garden, I cherish being outside.  I loathe spiders and snakes.  Both of which were discovered in our yard in the past 48 hours.  This is slightly concerning to me.  Although I am trying to keep my big girl panties on and understand that I should be excited to have both.  The tiny little snake was devouring the ants that gather around our tree in the front yard and the front what I can tell the GIANT (yes when you aren't fond of them two inches is GIANT - and if you notice that is my siding in the corner of the picture for size reference) spider eats lots of the pests that I don't want in my home or garden.  I'm trying to look at them through the same eyes I use with possums.  I'm trying.  I won't say succeeding yet, but as they are both still alive, it's a HUGE start.  At least for me. 

chillin' with mom

Yesterday was fantastic!  I rediscovered why "many hands make light work" is so powerful.  My friend and I worked on canning all day.  They had smoked some chicken breasts and we canned those up, and they had also smoked some onions, which are currently drying to be made into onion powder.  Both of our families work as a team with us owning some of the more pricey equipment and them owning some also.  I sent home some things for them to smoke and kept some of their stuff here to finish canning.  We were busy together for over 10 hours.  I have to admit it felt amazing to load up her car, very carefully with literally boxes of canned goods.  

It was so nice to have someone working side by side with me.  Chatting while chopping and planning future canning days.  I might end up ultimately getting a second canner, we could have made even more progress with two pressure canners.  The prep work is fairly quick, it's the actual canning that takes a little bit of time. 

Hubs and our other friend worked with a couple of young fella's to move my future cheese cave downstairs and then they did some furniture moving for our friend.  A huge bonus was that our friend gave us a beautiful metal patio table and chairs, that was originally offered to them.  The kind that we have been searching forever to find. It's older and needs to be cleaned up and painted, but it is going to look so awesome in the treetop garden. We will give our daughter the two rockers that are currently out there and then move the other table and chairs down to the lower patio.  Hopefully the spider decides to move to a different location before we do that. 

I can't wait to see how pretty the garden looks all together, although it will probably take a few weeks before we get it all done.  Hubs is busy at work, bringing on a new building, which translates into doing some of the more menial parts of his job in the evenings and weekends to allow the attention to flow where it's needed.  And we are going on a short camping trip this weekend, so that will kill any work happening at home. 

look who stopped by for a visit

I saw and shared something yesterday that really resonated with me.  In fact it is a theme that I know a lot of the people in my tribe are starting to feel.  About the value of building a village, about taking care of one another and doing the things that build stronger ties to one another. 

Maybe it is as simple as feeding the neighbors birds while they are out of town, checking in on the neighbor that lives alone.  Maybe mowing the grass or shoveling the snow.  Making sure folks have what they need.  Inviting them for a meal when they might otherwise be eating alone.  

I always thought it was my military upbringing that made those things feel second nature.  Yet the more I think about it while going about my day, the more I realize that is probably more factual than I thought. I live in the suburbs.  I can honestly say, I don't really know my neighbors, even though our houses are obscenely close together. Sadly, I feel like that is being orchestrated.  

Yards don't have front porches any longer, not meaningful ones, they are simple a place to decorate. Homes have curb appeal, but they aren't really welcoming.  Everything happens in the backyards of America.  That is where the cozy is, and lets be honest, no one walks around your house to your backyard, unless they are invited. 

I know I have seniors that live in my neighborhood, I know I have single folks, and lots of families of different ethnicities and culturally diverse beliefs.  I also know that I have a lot of folks that appear unfriendly. 

I say appear, because I am sure I appear that way too.  Although, if you get to know me, you will find I am anything but.  I almost feel like we have been used in a giant social experiment.  People work to exhaustion, they are driven to rest when they are home, because how else do you get the act of living completed while keeping up with the act of making enough money to live?  We have slowly been conditioned to more solitary pursuits, leaning into our neighbors is almost strange, intentionally so. 

While at Costco on Saturday, I was looking at the beautiful tomato plants.  They were super reasonable and I'd seen them the last 2 times we'd been.  I had pretty much decided that although I might not need any additions to my garden, I really wanted one, and was basically trying to justify it to myself.  This incredibly sweet woman stepped out of her own comfort zone to ask me if I'd ever grown them in a pot and if so was it difficult.  Within moments, we had a delightful conversation going on and I'd helped her select a healthy and strong tomato plant for her garden and given her some suggestions of how to really make it a great investment for her family.  It was wonderful.  It was what we should all be doing on a daily basis. 

I personally feel we are simply conditioned not to.  I hardly ever strike up conversations. I am not going to be the first one to speak with a complete stranger, unless I viably see they are in distress and need help. Yet when I lived in military quarters I would probably have been one of the first to welcome you to the neighborhood and ask if you needed help with anything.  

There is a different vibe in a military community.  Here in my subdivision the old timers are not always welcoming to the new folks.  There are some that actually discourage the newer families from even wanting to be part of the community.  

Working with my friends yesterday filled my heart.  I'm ready for more days like that. All of us have unique and wonderful gifts to share.  Each of us can lift up and support one another.  I guess the challenge becomes when are we going to do it. 

The feelings of joy that filled me yesterday of camaraderie and companionship are things I rarely feel in today's world.  Yet they are the very feelings I grew up with, the feelings I experienced as a young mom.  I definitely want that to become the norm.  I want connections with the people that surround me.  I want to understand them, I want to support them in times of trials and lean into them when I need the extra layer of support. 

I feel that maybe that is the path we are slowly getting back to... or at least I hope so.