Saturday, September 26, 2015

because...

It's been a minute.... a LONG minute.  Life has been on fire for me for months now.  In fact sitting out here on the deck listening to the random bird chirps, the buzz of who knows what bugs as the sun makes an incredibly slow ascent, is a rarity anymore.  But this is twice this week that I have stolen time out here in the mornings.

The leaves are starting to fall, the unsuccessful "garden" I planted is withering and just about to be ready to put away for the year.  I have a whopping single cherry tomato, that will be ripe in the next day or so.  The rest, well... I've been an amazing steward of the animal population out here in the county.

So much has been happening, so much has been going on.  And I am struggling to put those bits all together to form a life.


The hubs is finally on the mend, I am sure that he would love to be further down the path to recovery.  But when we remember it's not even been a year since the first attempt to "heal" him (or that could be kill, depending on your perspective). Every day his gait is straighter and I see him doing things that he has not done in a long time.



I have been blessed with time on the coast with my boy and his sweetie.  I have had stolen moments to enjoy my daughter and grand daughter.  Those have been priceless.  My boy and his sweetie even visited me at home this summer.  It's been so filled with blessings!






My two oldest and dearest friends were here just over a month ago.  I cherished that time.  I realized that time and distance really do not matter at all when you are sisters at heart!  It was a blessing to pick up were we stopped years ago, like the conversation simply never paused. The sadness comes later, when you realize how much distance there is and ache to sit and have a cup of coffee (or soda) and visit yet again. Ironically, out of my far away friends - I'm the only coffee drinker! I know!  Insanity, right?



My summer has been filled with beauty, love, walks on beaches, sitting in hot tubs under the stars, moon light chats, motorcycle rides in the sunshine, lots of beautiful sun rises, and sun sets, family, friends, loved ones, and memories to last a lifetime.  I am truly blessed!

As that fourth blood moon arrives tomorrow, I am a bit apprehensive.  Is it an omen?  Are there things simply waiting to happen that can steal that kind of happiness and joy?  Or... will it just be another of natures beautiful gifts to us?

The hubs is still snoozing.  His heart is heavy with an assortment of things.  I wish more than anything I could make it better.  That I could lighten that load and let him feel all the joy that I do.  He willingly takes all the grief (Lord knows he's listened to me vent a million times), his "safety" net of family and friends is holey at best.  He's that special kind of person that is always there for everyone - he strives to never let you down - yet when he is the one needing the boost... well... people are fickle.

It's odd... He's a far better person than I am.  He is that rare person that always puts others first, he remembers every birthday, he is loving and generous, and yet... he seems to be surrounded with people like me.  People with "good" intentions.  I forget birthday's, I forget to return calls, I am horrible at mailing things (if you are waiting for a card or gift from me... chances are the card is sitting in the basket in my kitchen - my thoughts made it - the card never will)

As the sun continues to rise and he continues to rest, I am hoping I can plan a weekend to lift his spirits, to renew his energy and to lift him up!  There are so many things that we love to do going on this weekend... Strange Folk, Octoberfest, beautiful weather for relaxing in the sunshine.

I hope this next blood moon does bring a change. I hope it ushers in a world full of love.  Where people are less biting (have you noticed that lately?), more kind, more compassionate.  I hope that the "era" that it brings forward is one full of understanding, support, with more givers and fewer takers.  I hope the users in this world finally learn that it's an easier struggle through this life when you lift each other up, not tear each other down.

I feel a strong pull to re-evaluate.  Do you?  Maybe, just maybe that is what will make the difference.


Well, it's time to sit back watch the squirrels fly through the changing leaves, drink another cup of coffee, work on a pair of socks while I watch the day unfurl...